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Title-"The Sensitive Skin of Colin Mochrie
Rating-PG-13 (for some language)
Pairing- Ryan/Colin
Summary- Ryan gives Colin a hickey and Deb is not happy.



Disclaimer- I don't own them and this story never happened. Any similarites to real life would be freaking awesome!!

Author's Note- Yes I know Col, Deb, and Ry are Canadian and in Canada there arn't Democarats and Republicans, but I figured Col they are familar enough to know what they are..plus Col is angry when he says it so it just strengthens the point of his anger. =)



It was funny, it really was. After how careful we’ve always been off-stage, something like this happens on-stage. I get suggestions involving Colin all the time and I always make sure it looks like Im doing it for the laughs. I take care in every detail to make sure it doesn’t look too real, because I know the fans go after every damn detail, but last night’s suggestion during that stupid dating game was just too tempting.

“A vampire with a taste for Colin’s blood”. Not just anyone’s blood, Colin’s blood. I couldn’t help, but smirk when I had read it. The game started out normal: Brad squeaked a question to Wayne, who answered in mock African, and then moved on to Colin.

Brad asked him to describe his perfect mate. The question alone made it hard for me to keep a straight face, but when Colin glanced at me lovingly and went on to say how his perfect would be tall, charming and have a set of stunning emerald eyes, I was biting the inside of my cheek to keep from losing it.

None of them know about Colin and I, even though they like to joke around about it, and none of them know how much truth Colin’s little impression of my “number one female fan” actually held, or how sincere the admiration in his eyes was. It took every ounce of will power in me not to just out right hug him every time he looked at me like that.

Colin is the only person who has always been there for me, hell in some bad times he’s been the only one who gave a damn if I lived or died. He gives me constant love even when I don’t deserve it; even when Im a stubborn jackass, or yelling at him for some inane thing just because I had a bad day, I can still see that glint in his eyes.

As Colin continued to stare longingly at me, Brad asked me an oddly appropriate question, to tell him my ideal meal. I responded in an accent Im sure was horrible, but I can’t really recall what I said because I was too busy watching Colin’s big brown eyes on me. To tell the truth I really can’t recall anything much of my bit up until when I “sank my fangs” into Col’s neck.

Jesus, just thinking about that makes me hot. My lips were latched onto the hollow b/w his neck and shoulder, and my tongue ran over every inch of skin it could find, I was being stupid not to realize what the result might be, but it felt so good; I was lost in the moment. Then I realized Colin was rolling his eyes back and gasping “oh God yes”, just like so many nights in my trailer.

He looked so wonderful like that, even when just messing with my head on stage. That’s the thought that made me remember I was on-stage, and how this might look a little too real to be part of the gag, especially since my hands were clutching his waist and his were at the back of neck.

The crowd was going wild, but the guys were shooting us weird looks,(except Brad, who just had a big grin on...I always wondered about him) so I stopped just as Drew hit the buzzer. Now here we are; sitting next to one another on the overstuffed couch in the modest living room of the Mochrie family home, being scolded like a couple of damned school children.

It kinda fits though, considering neither one of use can stop giggling. I feel sorta bad laughing while she is so upset, but this is just too much. It's just so..highschool; the pretty, popular girlfriend finds out that her perfect boyfriend got a hickey from his...best friend..who’s a guy..okay never mind. Maybe it’s not “highschool”, but it’s definitely juvenile. I didn’t mean to do it.

And who knew Deb would be this mad? Sure she never really finds any of the couple jokes about us funny, and yeah, she kinda forces a smile every time we kiss (on whose line? and off), but she’s never been angry like this. What’s really weird is that Deb is more angry about a little, accidental, hickey than Pat was when I told her that I was with Col.

Pat is an amazing person and it's no wonder she was so accepting, that’s just part of love. She yelled, yeah, but then she cried. She told me she cared about me and that she wanted me to be happy. I told her that’s how I felt too, and that’s why I was telling her the truth. She understood. She wished us happiness, and promised not to tell Deb.

We’re still friends, and I see her, the kids, and their new step-dad regularly. That was nothing like this, and all over a stupid little red mark no bigger than a dime. She’s pacing around the room, her hands in tight fists at her sides. I look over at Colin and let out a chuckle when I see his big grin.

“You find this funny?”

She’s glaring at me, and Im taken aback by the disdain in her voice.

“Um, uh...yeah..kinda.”

Colin is quietly laughing beside me, and his laughter is contagious. Damn him. I didn’t mean for that to be funny, I was just at a loss for words.

“I can’t believe you. The way you two carry on is enough to make people talk, but now this!”

She points to the incriminating mark just above Colin’s collar.

“What am I supposed to say to people?”

I didn’t say a word. I assumed that question was for Col, but Deb’s angry gaze was still on me, and he just sat there, the smile still on his face.

“Well, you could just tell people the truth...”

“Oh! Yeah! That’ll sound good! Oh, that! That’s just a hickey my husband got from his friend who everyone thinks is his lover!”

I can’t help myself. Im now cackling laughter so loud, I sound like Drew. If she only knew how many dinners he had cancelled with her to be with me, or how many nights I’ve screamed his name into the pillows of a hotel bed. I was still laughing but I had to say something.

“You could say that but, just add the fact that it was a joke!”

“Sure, that’ll work! Im sure everyone will believe that!”

For the first time since we’ve been here Colin looks directly at his wife.

“What is your problem, Deb? What are you afraid of, huh?”

He doesn’t sound angry, just sarcastic. He looks calm, and collected, but you could never really tell with him. Colin's the type of guy that seems together even when he's falling apart. Deb sits on the giant ottoman across from us and stares back at him, shocked.

“Are you scared that all your friends will think your trained husband is misbehaving and running around on you? Or that your storybook marriage is crumbling?”

The look of shock and hurt on Deb’s pretty face is back to anger. I can only look on in horror as their fight continues.

“Well it only started to crumble when you two started acting so...so..so gay!”

Uh,oh. Now Col is pissed. He rarely loses his temper, but Deb had hit a soft. I couldn’t help but feel a pang of pride that I was worthy of his losing it. Colin was smiling wider now; a wicked grin.

“Oh, so that’s it. You don’t care if people think your being cheated on, you’re just afraid that people will think you married a fag. That is so fucking typical of you. Just so small minded and Republican of you. And ya know what the fucking cherry on the proverbial sundae is, Deb?”

If Deb knew what he was talking about it didn’t show. She is just looking at him; no emotion on her face. I on the other hand can only imagine what my face is showing. Col never curses, not even when he stubs his toe. He's a firm believer in the reasoning that people curse b/c they aren’t smart enough to come up with something else to say.

The conversation itself was throwing me for a loop. Colin speaking so bluntly was unnatural, especially to his wife, who, although, he never was actually in love with, respected a great deal. This isn’t totally un-enjoyable though.

“It’s not the fact that I might be gay, or even that I might be having an affair someone that gets to you. It’s the fact that since it’s Ryan, you know I found someone who loves me, and I love back.”

Now Deb reacts. She has tears in her eyes and she looks away, defeated.

“So, it’s true then?”

“Of course it is.”

He answers so quickly that it takes me a second to realize what happened; we’ve just been outed, literally. I look at him and all the love and pride I feel comes rushing to the surface all at once. That pleasant smile of his is back again, only now it seems different some how; like the weight is gone and he’s finally smiling for himself.

“How long?”

Colin’s fingers are laced with mine now, and he gives my hand a light squeeze.

“Well, Ryan is really better with dates.”

This whole time was like watching them through a fish bowl, so it takes me a second to recover from hearing my own name. Im kinda confused at first, but then I realize what he’s trying to do.


“Twenty-six years.”

Whoa. Was that my voice? Im only vaguely aware Im crying. Neither one of them seems to understand my answer, so I elaborate.

“I’ve been in love with Col since I met him, but if we must get into semantics than..five years.”

Colin and I just sit there staring into each other’s eyes.


“Im sorry Colin. I know how it is to love someone so much it hurts, I guess I just don’t know how to do it right. You two will be happy together. Im going to go to my sister’s place, call me so we can take care of the details.” She hesitates before adding the last part. “I love you.”

Colin looks over at his soon to be ex-wife.

“I love you too Deb...and Im sorry too. I should have told you sooner.”

She starts to say something, but she tears up, and rushes towards the door. Colin and I are silent as we hear the sounds of her car backing out the driveway. I just sit there, tears streaming down my face. I hate crying in front of him, but he’s crying too now. Which isn't surprising since Col always believed friends didn't let friends cry alone.

His warm coffee eyes are glassy and he’s still smiling. He is just so beautiful. I have no words, so I pull him to me and just hold him. No one else makes me feel this safe, and loved. I never want to leave him, and I’ll never have to. We pull apart and he kisses me. A perfect, innocent, peck on the lips.

“Ya know if that little hickey gave you so much confidence Im sure I could give ya a few more.”

It figures the first thing I say when I regain my voice is so stupid. Colin smiles and his whole face lights up, along with my heart.

“You are so immature.”

He says rolling his eyes, and pulling me into another hug. Im in heaven, and suddenly Im very thankful that I have an attraction for Colin that not even a huge audience and several TV cameras can bring down. Im also thankful for the sensitive, Scottish skin of Colin Mochrie, for without it we’d still be living a lie.

End
1/30/06 ~~~

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