A Strange Escape 11/14

[charminglygawky.livejournal.com]

Title – A Strange Escape.
Chapter – 11/14
Author – Charminglygawky
Pairing - Ryan/Colin
Rating – for the most part about a 15 for swearing.
Disclaimer – I own nothing and nobody!
Feedback – Adored - in fact I do believe that it makes the world go round!
 
Part 10 of my insane fic - key point is that Colin is English - did I mention that I have a deranged imagination?
As ever thanks to jerluvsdean for her help and for just being on the other end of msn!  XD 


A/N – Colin is dissatisfied with life, does Greg hold the key? 

We were even more relaxed as a group after that, Ryan and I tried very hard not to flaunt the fact that we were Ryan and me, at least in front of Brad anyway. And for his part Brad did his best to be friendly towards us. And gradually as the days turned into weeks he seemed to find it easier. Maybe that was because he had accepted that Ryan didn’t return his feelings, or maybe he really was moving on. I didn’t know him well enough to tell. But Ryan seemed happy so I assumed that Brad really was a character who could ‘bounce back’ as he put it.

With a cheerful group we coasted through the next few weeks, me and Ryan were blissfully happy. We didn’t always share a room, we were both determined not to break off to be our own little couple, we were a group, and that is how we continued. Of course nothing that good can last forever and it seemed like no time at all that Ryan and I found ourselves in a hotel room together, sitting next to each other just waiting until it was time to go down to the reception to meet up with the others for our very last show.

Nobody had talked about what we were going to do once it was over, I think we were all trying to ignore the fact that it would ever end. Even then, we were sitting in that motel room in silence rather than actually talk about what we were both thinking.

Eventually it was time to go, and still in silence we did. His hand searched mine out and clasped it as we walked together away from our room his thumb gently rubbing at my wrist. That last show was incredible, the best we’d ever done. I had Ryan in stitches over something as ridiculous as a cat. It felt wonderful.

I would have liked to have said that the last show could have been the huge extravaganza that we all wanted, for closure if nothing else. But it wasn’t. We were in LA, we had driven the entire length of the West coast of America and not in a straight line either. Just getting to LA was an achievement in itself, but it was a big city, and we were complete unknowns performing an all but unknown form of comedy. It was amazing that Ry had even managed to get us in anywhere, as it was it was hardly swanky. We didn’t care, smaller spaces are better for improv and rowdy audiences come up with more suggestions.

And then it was all over; we didn’t even get an encore.

So there we were the six of us, huddled around a table in a dark corner of a dive bar. In silence. There were plenty of drinks littering the table, all of which were untouched. The mood was sombre not jubilant, the celebration of things completed was fast turning into a feeling of loss.

“So...” Started Drew in a valiant but futile attempt to start a conversation. Or maybe he just needed to break the silence; we all knew he had nothing to say.

“Yeah.” Agreed Chip.

“Fuck this.” Snorted Greg after another silence had descended upon the table. “I came out to celebrate. We’ve had a fucking successful tour and we should be happy.” Grabbing a random glass from the table he downed half of it in one go. “We’ve had a good time and it can’t end like this.” His voice had a tinge of desperation to it as he downed the rest of the drink, screwing up his face in distaste as he tried to figure out what it had been.

Next to me Ryan made a strange sound, like a half strangled gasp, or maybe even a sob before throwing his chair back he leapt up, knocking into the table as he made a dash for the door.

Everybody turned to watch him leave. Everyone but me that is, I knew why he was upset; I didn’t need to see him go, I couldn’t see him go. Instead I regarded the pools of beer and various drinks that had sloshed over the sides of the shaken glasses. The separate puddles ran and intermingled with the brighter colours of cocktails, the layer of scum or foam swirling on top showing the currents that were present even in such miniature rivers.

Eventually I had to look up; I had to meet the five pairs of worried and slightly accusing eyes that were regarding me cautiously.

“Shit, Col, is everything...?” Greg looked genuinely concerned for me, not just Ryan, whilst beside him Brad was failing miserably at not looking furious.

“No, not really.” I answered truthfully in a small voice which was barely discernable above the terrible music being pumped out of the cheap speakers over the bar.

Brad’s gaze was turning murderous but Greg still just looked sympathetic. “What’s wrong?” He asked softly and kindly.

“The fucking Atlantic.” I bit back at him, my tone far more cutting than Greg deserved. Standing up I picked up both mine and Ryan’s jackets. “Excuse me.” I said to no one and everyone turning to follow Ryan.

He hadn’t gone far, I found him leaning on the wall by the entrance to the bar. “I was beginning to think you weren’t coming.” He said unemotionally holding his hand out for his coat.

“I nearly didn’t.” I answered without thinking as I handed it to him. He froze and the coat slipped between our grasps and fell to the floor.

“You...?” The sentence remained unfinished and the coat on the floor as he turned and walked away from me, fast, again.

Cursing myself I scooped up his coat and ran after him. He shook my hand off of his arm and I dropped back in shock, he’d never turned me away before. But I kept him within my sights; I was hopelessly lost within a couple of blocks but I wasn’t giving in. If I had to resort to tailing rather than chasing him I would.

It must, therefore, have come as a surprise to him when I snuck up behind him in a park where he was slumped onto a bench, it was chilly out and I slipped his jacket around his shoulders.

He leapt up with a strangled shout and my heart broke to see he had tears running down his face even if he wasn’t openly crying. He relaxed when he saw it was me but I wasn’t greeted with a kiss or a hug or even a smile. No, I was greeted with a look of despair and slumped shoulders as he flopped back down on the bench.

“You fucking scared me Colin.”

“Sorry... I should have made a sound like a duck.” I said, trying to remind him of our first meeting on a bench in the dark. He visibly winced but did not respond. “Ryan, you know I didn’t mean that don’t you.”

“What.” He huffed, refusing to look at me as I sat next to him.

“That I wasn’t going to follow you. I will always follow you, anywhere, anytime.” I tried to inject as much feeling into my voice as I possibly could, I needed him to know that I was sincere. He dropped his face into his hands scrubbing hard at his face. “Ry?” I asked putting a hand on his shoulder forcing myself to give him space and not to just pull him to me and hold him tight.

“I don’t want to lose you.” He muttered, not crying but with a definite catch in his voice.

I stopped holding back and reached for him, squeezing him so hard that I must have left bruises I felt him clutch at me in return. “Ryan, you won’t lose me.”

“How do you know that? What are we going to do?” He whispered desperately in my ear.

“I don’t know Ry.” I answered truthfully. He sniffled and clutched at me even harder; gently I broke his grip and leaned back so that I could meet his gaze. “Ryan. Do you love me?”

“Yes.”

“And I love you, so, so much. I don’t know what we are going to do but we will do something.” He sighed and sank back into my arms holding me tenderly now, not clutching anymore. “I love you Ry, I don’t want to lose you either.” I whispered holding him, trying to reassure him.

After a few minutes he sat up and wiped his face self-consciously. “Sorry Col, I don’t normally do this, it’s just that, well, you’re the only person I have ever really cared about like this. And you just turned up out of the blue for this tour and now it’s over and...”

Leaning towards him I kissed him softly. “I’m not going to disappear. This tour has changed my life. I won’t go back to how I was before.” I decided that it was my turn to seek a little comfort. “Ryan?”

He looked up at my nervous tone. “Col? What is it?”

“Ryan, promise you won’t let me take the easy way out? I want you, never forget that... but my family, they have always controlled what I do. This is the first time I’ve done anything by myself. Don’t let me slip back into doing what they want.”

I was facing the fear that I had been holding at bay. I knew that I loved Ryan. And, for once, I was confident that he loved me. But I didn’t trust myself. What if when I went back to England my family manipulated me, they had always succeeded before and I had so much more to lose now. What if they did it again? What if they placed a seed of doubt in my mind that made me lose Ryan? My mind was spiralling out of control, the whole tour had seemed like a dream, I was terrified that when I went home that it would become little more than that.

“Colin? Colin calm down.” He sounded stern, my frantic thought processes screeched to a halt and I allowed myself to focus on the man in front of me. “Col, you back with me buddy?”

I nodded and tried to snuggle into him but he held me away slightly. “Col, what was that? Why are you so scared, I thought we just agreed to stick together?”

“We did.” I tried to assure him. “But I need to face my family, and I have to do it alone.”

“Why?”

“Because they are in England.” I answered as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Don’t you want me to come with you?” He probed gently.

“Ry, the plane?” I asked in amazement.

“You’ll hold my hand right?” He tried to joke.

“You would do that for me?” My eyes were wide as the magnitude of his generosity hit me. He didn’t answer just smiled and kissed me gently.

We found the guys back at the bar, we’d only been gone about an hour and in that time they had drunk their way through a substantial amount of alcohol, our arrival as cheerful individuals was all that was needed to kick start a carnival atmosphere.

We did end with a celebration after all.

I booked both Ryan and I tickets back to England the very next day, they were booked for two weeks time. We were flying from Vancouver again as Ryan had to get his car back, unlike the motor home which could be returned to the hire company in LA. Meaning that we had to do the whole trip again in reverse; luckily we could take a more direct route and so the two weeks I had given us to accomplish that was more than enough time.

Saying goodbye to the guys as one by one they jetted off back to wherever they had to be was tough. Greg went first to Sans Francisco, then Drew heading back up to Cleveland, the little group waving them off getting smaller and smaller until eventually it was just me and Ryan waving Brad off. He gave each of us a tight hug, then locking eyes with Ryan as he said his goodbyes, I think that despite all his earlier words and actions of goodwill towards us that that was when he finally gave up all hope of a relationship between them. When he was gone and we were heading back to the car which was already packed with our stuff I chose to ignore how Ryan’s eyes were just that little bit brighter than normal.

During the long drives I tried to explain to Ryan about my family and how controlling they were. He never seemed to quite understand though so in the end I dropped it and we talked about his family instead. We had decided that we would tell his family first. When we arrived in Vancouver I was going to have to meet his parents, and all his brothers.

The closer we got to Vancouver the more I started sticking much closer to the speed limits, and I very quickly learnt that seducing Ryan was a very good way to get him to stop at the next motel for the night. I couldn’t put off meeting his family indefinitely, and I didn’t want to. But I was dragging my heels.

I needn’t have worried. His family was gorgeous, which I should have expected really. They welcomed me into their family and I felt more at home there after two days then I had ever felt at home. I dreaded the meeting with my parents even more as I saw Ryan tease his mother by putting shelves up just a little bit too high for her. Or watch her plot her revenge with a perfectly executed anecdote from his childhood just when he had taken a large mouthful of food and was therefore helpless to interrupt.

My family would never accept Ryan so easily. I still needed him to come with me but I dreaded it too. What would they say to him?

Comments

[saiya-tina.livejournal.com]

Aw, that was a sad chapter....but Ryan's family is really amazing! I loved that first part with them sad about the tour ending and I really felt bad when they went their seperate ways! Oh noes, I wonder what will happen now?

Ah, Brad....maybe he'll make house with Wayne! I can't wait for the next chapter!

[charminglygawky.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I did think that the end of the tour would be a sad thing, glad I got that across!

Braddy boy... well I suppose I could just leave him all broken, or would that be mean? XD

[saiya-tina.livejournal.com]

Yes, that's mean! Or give him to me! I'll take good care of him! I'll put him in the closet with my BnP Brad and Ryan!

[charminglygawky.livejournal.com]

It would be mean hmmmm, well now the question becomes 'am I mean?' XD wait and seeeeeeeeee!

XD

[jie-jie.livejournal.com]

Yay for updates! ^_^ Really enjoyed this part, bit of angst, bit of fluff, what more can a girl want? Very sad that the tour is over, enjoyed reading about their adventures on the road. Next few chapters should be interesting though. Hope Colin helps Ryan through the flight and through meeting his uber-controlling family!

My favourite part had to be the first scene in the bar. It's so horrible when a close group have to split up and you captured the emotions brilliantly.

Can't wait to read more, keep writing! ^_^

[charminglygawky.livejournal.com]

Aww thanks. I'm really glad that the bar scene worked, I wanted them to be a group and be sorta sharing emotions. But I always feel slightly out of my depth when writing more than 2 or maybe 3 people at the same time, I'm terrified of losing characters!

Yup, more soon!

[rycolfan.livejournal.com]

Aww....lovely chapter! Beautiful descriptions and you captured their emotions really well :o)

I wasn't expecting another chapter so soon - it was a nice surprise!

As always, can't wait for more x

[charminglygawky.livejournal.com]

I'm going for one every other day, cos I'm impatient! XD

Aww thanks for the praise! Makes me very happy!

[neon-love-chick.livejournal.com]

I went through your whole fic at light speed, as you can see. :D I noticed we really share a lot of characterization of the boys! Does that make me a horrible person that I almost wanted Ryan to hook up with Brad? I have such a weak spot for that guy! :P

This was really good, and your Greg is very cool btw. And Ryan is adorable, like he probably is in real life.

Looking forward to more!

[charminglygawky.livejournal.com]

Oooo, thankies! That is quite a lot of reading! Do we share characterizations? I think yours are much better, but I am my own harshest critic!

Lol, you can want Ryan to hook up with whoever, I think Ry/Brad is pretty cute normally, but this fic is sooooo Ry/Col it's verging on ridiculous!

Thank you so much for Greggie praise, I adore him!

(I'll email you back in a second, as soon as I get a chance!)

[draconica-nova.livejournal.com]

Ryan is a troubled young thing, I just want to duct tape him to Colin forever hug him. :c

Encore, more! Cliffhanger is most cliffhangery. :D

[charminglygawky.livejournal.com]

The first idea, defo the first idea, now where did I put that roll of tape?

Thankies, more soon!