So What Happens Now? 1/1
May. 2nd, 2010 12:42 am![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
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wl_fanfictionOkay, so here's the thing. Draconica_Nova's one shot Hollywood Treatment got to me as in: Well, what about Deb's? And inspired a little brain fart based off of a personal experience! So wee!
This is for you, Nova!!!! I love you, girl!!! Please, keep not being offended!
<3
pd
So What Happens Now?
By: Pd
Unedited! Ignorant hick-attack!
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters, and nothing is meant by this but a harmless piece of lit
Rating: R for language and sexuality
Pairing: Ry/Col
Summary: It’s from Deb’s point of view, having The Talk with Jennifer.
Jennifer opened the door, looking lovelier than I’d ever felt. “Hey Debs, wow, you look awful, what’s wrong?”
“I need your help with something, Jenjen… please tell me you still smoke?
“Well, uh, yeah, let’s go out back.”
With some drinks in our hands and smoke in our lungs, she waited patiently with wide eyes as I smoked the first one down in three puffs. With the second one at least lit, I had to clear my throat to begin. “I think I’ve finally figured them out, Jen… Who? Who else? ColinandRyan. Ah, you look uncomfortable. You knew, too… Greg probably told you. It’s okay, I want to tell my story first before I figure out if I’m mad at you, as well.”
“I don’t know when exactly I figured them out. It would be a cliché to say that I’d always known, but then I had, because how couldn’t you?
“When you look at your husband and his best friend’s almost psychic connection, one you yourself had never had with anyone but you’d hoped you’d be married long enough to have it. When you look at that, how couldn’t you know?
“When you see them kissing onstage, the jokes, the audience’s shrieking laughter and eating it up with shovels. It’s enough to make you want to hate them and your husband. How do you deal with something like that? I mean, everyone loves the fuckin’ show, even me, because it’s hysterical. Not so much in the later years, because the kisses began to get longer, the groping more in depth, and I began to get jealous.
“No one is supposed to touch my husband, or even look at him like that. He used to think that kind of jealousy was cute, because that meant you saw him as worth defending, and it was true. Now, if I ask him if he could spend a week with me out camping, he can’t. He’s going with Ryan to a filming of some comedy flick he’s gotten a bit part in.
“Then I’d get mad at him… start asking him if it would kill him to stay in the same room with me for more than a few hours a month. He calls me clingy. Maybe it’s true now. I dunno.”
Jennifer clears her throat hesitantly, cigarette smoldering forgotten in her tiny hand. I blink at her as if coming out of a stupor. “So… so wait, what are you telling me, you and Col had The Fight?”
I smile, leaning my head back. “‘The Fight.’ That’s cute, because everyone already knows which fight is ‘The Fight’. People have been waiting for this ‘Fight’ for what, 10 years?”
Jennifer has to clear her throat, and she won’t look at me when she croaks out a weak. “Twenty…”
“Twenty years… sounds about right…” I shrugged, rising and grabbing a mug from the mug tree that says ‘World’s Best Husband!’ on it and stubbing out my cigarette right on the inside’s bright white porcelain. It was Colin’s when we came over to visit them. “But anyway. All I know is that I feel- felt, like I wasn’t in on the joke, and everyone was laughing at me for it. I dismissed it as paranoia for a long time.
“I did- I do, feel dirty for following him and Highpockets earlier this evening in a friend’s car (mine was in the shop, not really.)
“But it answered my questions, neat and to the point. When he and Ryan came out of the hotel room, flushed and so damned happy looking, I couldn’t find it in me to do anything but hate them for it.
“Fuck that they’re a gay couple, I don’t give a damn, I have so many fucking friends whom I love that are gay, it’s just like freckles to me now.
“But it was hatred of their happiness that made me sit on the hood of his car and wait until they came out…
Holding hands, thumbs rubbing over knuckles as if even though they’d still made Love less than half an hour ago, they still couldn’t touch the other enough.
They didn’t drop hands when he saw me, and for some reason, I was rather proud of that, but that didn’t change the fact of the current reality. “Debs!” He gasped.
Ryan swore softly, flushing a bright red and glaring at me angrily, as though I was the one caught. He was still shaking in shame, a thin, trembling line before Colin drew them in closer together, their hands gripping tightly together.
“You should have told me, Colin,” I rubbed at my eyes, trying to unsee what I’d seen, trying to be calm.
“Debs-”
“You should have fucking told me… that we were wasting our time loving you two.”
“We’re in love, Deb,” he declared, “And if you can’t accept that-“
“Don’t be so fucking self-righteous, Colin,” I spat, nearly tearing my hair out. Ryan drew breath to unleash his temper on me, but I wasn’t without my own. “I’m speaking to my husband right now, Ryan, you can have him when we’re done.” To my surprise, he did, for which I thank him. Of course, I won’t, ever.
I turned back to Colin, looking so confused. Join the club, handsome. “You should have told me, because I’ve been wondering what I did wrong for so many years- goddammit Colin! Why did you stay with me? It’s obviously love between you, so why?!” I hiccupped, tears flowing freely now. It was a lot of pain choking its way up my throat, and Colin’s face held the same look of agonized shame. Let him swim in it for a time.
I shook my head, fighting back against the urge to drag this out, make a scene, but I’d never been one of those girls. I wiped at my eyes with a sigh. “Goddammit I was in love with you still… You should’ve… you should’ve just told me…”
“And now I’m here…” I grunt out, shaking now, throat aching, eyes itching again.
Jennifer swallowed hard, looking ill and about ready to cry. She reached out and tentatively put a hand over mine. “I’m sorry…”
It took a few moments, and a few breaths before my throat would stop closing up and the fresh cigarette in my hand to stop trembling before I could speak. “Thank you…”
It was silent for a while, but I was okay with that.
“So… so what happens now?” she asks.
I tap my cigarette into the coffee mug. Several butts lay in it now, along with a small mountain of ashes, and I smile at them before looking up at her, even though none of this is funny. “I don’t know.”
This is for you, Nova!!!! I love you, girl!!! Please, keep not being offended!
<3
pd
So What Happens Now?
By: Pd
Unedited! Ignorant hick-attack!
Disclaimer: I don’t own any of the characters, and nothing is meant by this but a harmless piece of lit
Rating: R for language and sexuality
Pairing: Ry/Col
Summary: It’s from Deb’s point of view, having The Talk with Jennifer.
Jennifer opened the door, looking lovelier than I’d ever felt. “Hey Debs, wow, you look awful, what’s wrong?”
“I need your help with something, Jenjen… please tell me you still smoke?
“Well, uh, yeah, let’s go out back.”
With some drinks in our hands and smoke in our lungs, she waited patiently with wide eyes as I smoked the first one down in three puffs. With the second one at least lit, I had to clear my throat to begin. “I think I’ve finally figured them out, Jen… Who? Who else? ColinandRyan. Ah, you look uncomfortable. You knew, too… Greg probably told you. It’s okay, I want to tell my story first before I figure out if I’m mad at you, as well.”
“I don’t know when exactly I figured them out. It would be a cliché to say that I’d always known, but then I had, because how couldn’t you?
“When you look at your husband and his best friend’s almost psychic connection, one you yourself had never had with anyone but you’d hoped you’d be married long enough to have it. When you look at that, how couldn’t you know?
“When you see them kissing onstage, the jokes, the audience’s shrieking laughter and eating it up with shovels. It’s enough to make you want to hate them and your husband. How do you deal with something like that? I mean, everyone loves the fuckin’ show, even me, because it’s hysterical. Not so much in the later years, because the kisses began to get longer, the groping more in depth, and I began to get jealous.
“No one is supposed to touch my husband, or even look at him like that. He used to think that kind of jealousy was cute, because that meant you saw him as worth defending, and it was true. Now, if I ask him if he could spend a week with me out camping, he can’t. He’s going with Ryan to a filming of some comedy flick he’s gotten a bit part in.
“Then I’d get mad at him… start asking him if it would kill him to stay in the same room with me for more than a few hours a month. He calls me clingy. Maybe it’s true now. I dunno.”
Jennifer clears her throat hesitantly, cigarette smoldering forgotten in her tiny hand. I blink at her as if coming out of a stupor. “So… so wait, what are you telling me, you and Col had The Fight?”
I smile, leaning my head back. “‘The Fight.’ That’s cute, because everyone already knows which fight is ‘The Fight’. People have been waiting for this ‘Fight’ for what, 10 years?”
Jennifer has to clear her throat, and she won’t look at me when she croaks out a weak. “Twenty…”
“Twenty years… sounds about right…” I shrugged, rising and grabbing a mug from the mug tree that says ‘World’s Best Husband!’ on it and stubbing out my cigarette right on the inside’s bright white porcelain. It was Colin’s when we came over to visit them. “But anyway. All I know is that I feel- felt, like I wasn’t in on the joke, and everyone was laughing at me for it. I dismissed it as paranoia for a long time.
“I did- I do, feel dirty for following him and Highpockets earlier this evening in a friend’s car (mine was in the shop, not really.)
“But it answered my questions, neat and to the point. When he and Ryan came out of the hotel room, flushed and so damned happy looking, I couldn’t find it in me to do anything but hate them for it.
“Fuck that they’re a gay couple, I don’t give a damn, I have so many fucking friends whom I love that are gay, it’s just like freckles to me now.
“But it was hatred of their happiness that made me sit on the hood of his car and wait until they came out…
Holding hands, thumbs rubbing over knuckles as if even though they’d still made Love less than half an hour ago, they still couldn’t touch the other enough.
They didn’t drop hands when he saw me, and for some reason, I was rather proud of that, but that didn’t change the fact of the current reality. “Debs!” He gasped.
Ryan swore softly, flushing a bright red and glaring at me angrily, as though I was the one caught. He was still shaking in shame, a thin, trembling line before Colin drew them in closer together, their hands gripping tightly together.
“You should have told me, Colin,” I rubbed at my eyes, trying to unsee what I’d seen, trying to be calm.
“Debs-”
“You should have fucking told me… that we were wasting our time loving you two.”
“We’re in love, Deb,” he declared, “And if you can’t accept that-“
“Don’t be so fucking self-righteous, Colin,” I spat, nearly tearing my hair out. Ryan drew breath to unleash his temper on me, but I wasn’t without my own. “I’m speaking to my husband right now, Ryan, you can have him when we’re done.” To my surprise, he did, for which I thank him. Of course, I won’t, ever.
I turned back to Colin, looking so confused. Join the club, handsome. “You should have told me, because I’ve been wondering what I did wrong for so many years- goddammit Colin! Why did you stay with me? It’s obviously love between you, so why?!” I hiccupped, tears flowing freely now. It was a lot of pain choking its way up my throat, and Colin’s face held the same look of agonized shame. Let him swim in it for a time.
I shook my head, fighting back against the urge to drag this out, make a scene, but I’d never been one of those girls. I wiped at my eyes with a sigh. “Goddammit I was in love with you still… You should’ve… you should’ve just told me…”
“And now I’m here…” I grunt out, shaking now, throat aching, eyes itching again.
Jennifer swallowed hard, looking ill and about ready to cry. She reached out and tentatively put a hand over mine. “I’m sorry…”
It took a few moments, and a few breaths before my throat would stop closing up and the fresh cigarette in my hand to stop trembling before I could speak. “Thank you…”
It was silent for a while, but I was okay with that.
“So… so what happens now?” she asks.
I tap my cigarette into the coffee mug. Several butts lay in it now, along with a small mountain of ashes, and I smile at them before looking up at her, even though none of this is funny. “I don’t know.”
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no subject
Date: 2010-05-02 10:16 am (UTC)That actually made me tear up lol.
Like, I mean, properly tear up. I had to physically push myself closer to the screen, to actually see the writing through my tear laden up lenses XD
Wow, aww you captured Deb's hurt so well, it was literally painful to read :P
Only amazing writing does that my friend, you're incredible. Love it :)
xx
no subject
Date: 2010-05-03 01:55 am (UTC)Draconica did it lulz
<3
no subject
Date: 2010-05-02 03:12 pm (UTC)I love how Deb confides in Jen, and how she calles her 'Jenjen' (d'aww!). It really made me feel for her and how all she wanted was for Colin to be honest, and getting her heart broken when she realises that the situation is out of her hands.
It actually makes me turn on Colin a little, which is good! That's a great skill of writing! :D
<3
no subject
Date: 2010-05-03 01:59 am (UTC)Your fan
pd
no subject
Date: 2010-05-03 09:30 am (UTC)You? My fan? *g* You sure know how to flatter moi. ^^
*if flackled with love* <3 you too!
no subject
Date: 2010-05-03 05:47 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-05-04 07:54 pm (UTC)Oh for crying out loud you ass-hat...you should have told her!
So....liking Deb and resenting Colin?? Unheard of in my world :-) but you did it, so good for you...All I need now is some quiet time in the rubber-room :-)
no subject
Date: 2011-01-02 11:08 pm (UTC)