Flight of Fancy, part 5/11

[kalimyre.livejournal.com]

Flight of Fancy

By kalimyre

Pairing: Ryan/Colin

Rating: R

Category: First time, romance, AU

Summary: In which wrong conclusions are jumped to and Colin lures Ryan up on stage at knifepoint.

Notes: Thank you clayangel, and happy birthday! I'd sing, but I think it's better for everyone if we avoid that. Thank you indybaggins for reading and cheering and posting awesome videos on early, tired mornings. Thank you anesthesiagirl for making me think and catching what I miss.

Part One, Part Two, Part Three, Part Four

Part 5

Colin woke once during the night and he sat up in bed, blinking his way through the inevitable disorientation of yet another unfamiliar hotel room. Diffuse light from the city came through the glass balcony doors, casting an orange glow across the room and creating pockets of shadow around the sleeping form on the next bed over. Colin tilted his head to the side, still more asleep than awake, and studied Ryan for a long moment.

He sprawled in his sleep, long legs slung to either side, one foot hanging off the edge of the mattress. He’d kicked off most of the covers and there was only a corner tugged across his midsection, leaving his shoulders bare and his bony knees poking out. The dim light favored his face, giving the impression of clean, simple features, classic and honest in a way that Colin had missed, working with the artificial beauty of show business. Ryan breathed steadily, counterpoint to the low hum of the heater and the distant but never quite gone sounds of traffic below.

Colin watched until his eyes grew heavy again and he lay back down, turning on his side to face Ryan. It was strangely reassuring to have another person in the room. Ryan was like an anchor, giving him a sense of identity in the anonymous place where hundreds of other people had slept. He’d be forgotten as soon as he left, the room reset for the next guest, but for now there was someone who knew who he was, right there with him.

Ryan’s breathing was hypnotic, and Colin drifted back into sleep counting each breath and timing his own to match.

In the morning, he woke to find himself facing an empty bed, the covers rumpled in a way that made him want to climb in and see if they were still warm. Colin sat up, swung his legs over the side of the bed and stretched, rubbing his eyes sleepily. The bedside clock said it was just after eight, which meant he had plenty of time to make it to his first show at ten.

He padded into the kitchen for a drink of water and found Ryan sitting at the table, nibbling leftover Italian food, wearing one of the thick white hotel robes. His hair was damp and uncombed, a few pieces falling artlessly over his forehead, and his face had a dark shadow of stubble, making his jaw line stand out.

“Hey,” Ryan said, waving a piece of garlic bread at him.

Colin smiled and got his water, joining Ryan at the table. “Good morning.”

Ryan nodded, leaning back in his chair. “Did you know that bathroom has a Jacuzzi? You could have a party in there.”

“Oh?” Colin quirked one eyebrow and slid a finger down his water glass, gathering condensation. “What did you have in mind?”

Ryan blinked at him, clearly flustered, and Colin chuckled. Ryan’s eyes narrowed, but he was smiling. “I suppose that would depend on whether I get a fancy dinner tonight. I don’t give it away for take out, you know.”

“Is that so?” Colin gave him a sweeping, speculative look, then met his eyes. Ryan kept a straight face for about five seconds and then gave up, shaking his head and laughing.

“You had me going for a minute there,” Ryan said.

Colin grinned. “I know.”

Ryan threw a bit of bread crust at him and Colin ducked, then placed a threatening hand on his water glass. “Don’t make me break out the big guns.”

“Okay, okay, I give,” Ryan said, holding his hands up. “Besides, don’t we have to get going? You have more shows today, right?”

“Yeah,” Colin agreed reluctantly. “Guess I better get ready.” He shuffled off to the bathroom to shower, trying to quiet the nervous flutter kicking up in his stomach. It was always like this before a show, his throat tightening and his hands picking up the slightest tremor. These all day events really took it out of him and he found himself hoping Ryan would agree to come back to the hotel with him afterward. It was so much easier to relax when he had someone to laugh and play around with.

Colin was just belting his own robe after his shower when he heard a knock at the door. He came out of the bathroom in time to see Ryan opening the door, and Jamie standing on the other side holding a dry cleaning bag.

“Um,” Ryan said uncomfortably. “Hi, uh... Colin’s here, he’s...”

“Right here,” Colin said, walking over. “Are those my clothes for today?”

Jamie looked at him, and then at Ryan, his face carefully neutral. “Yes,” he said, handing over the bag. He edged past Ryan, glancing around the room, his gaze lingering on the empty wine bottle on the counter and the dirty dishes in the sink. He turned to Colin with an inquisitive expression. Colin pretended not to see it.

“I’ll get dressed,” he said, ducking into the bedroom. He put the clothes on quickly, hoping Jamie wasn’t grilling Ryan out there. He couldn’t hear any talking, but he knew Jamie must have a million questions, since it was obvious Ryan had spent the night. Colin shook his head, laughing softly to himself. Jamie had probably leapt to the obvious and wrong conclusion, given what he knew about Colin. Although Colin never dated while on tour, he had seen men before; in his line of work it was accepted, nearly commonplace.

When Colin came back out into the living area, Ryan was perched on the edge of the couch, fidgeting with his hands. Jamie was still standing just inside the door, although he’d shut it behind him. He was carefully not looking at Ryan.

“You’re kind of early, aren’t you?” Colin asked, moving to sit beside Ryan. Ryan flashed him a grateful smile, then ducked his head again.

“Schedule change,” Jamie said briskly, crossing to the other couch and sitting down. “There was a problem getting the ducks in on time for the rotisserie spot, so it got pushed back and we needed something else to put in the first morning slot and everyone else was already taken so I’ll need you to come in an hour early. Your shows are the same, just all bumped by one hour; you’ll be done early this afternoon too. I’ve already got the supply changes worked out and the schedule on the main conference board has been updated so the crowd knows what’s going on. There’s a car downstairs waiting for us when you’re ready.”

Colin nodded, sighing. He’d hoped for a bit more time in the morning, but he supposed it was best to get it over with. Besides, now he’d have more time after his shows to pick up some food and give Ryan a real lesson. The thought cheered him and he straightened, clapping Ryan on the back. “You better get dressed,” he said.

Ryan muttered assent and went to the bedroom, shutting the door. Colin was left looking blandly at Jamie, daring him to ask. Jamie opened his mouth, but shut it again, tapping his fingers rapidly on his thighs. “Is that a good idea?” he asked after a long moment.

“Is what?” Colin replied, blinking innocently.

“He’s technically a company employee. You could even be considered his boss, and under those circumstances... it just doesn’t look good.”

“You worry a lot about what looks good,” Colin pointed out, not adding that he was sick of it.

“That’s my job. Colin, please, if you want some company I’m sure you can find someone who doesn’t work for KT. I know you don’t like all the fuss about your image, but it really is important, it matters and I would really, really appreciate it if you could bend a little on this one, please?” Jamie was nearly wringing his hands, leaning forward on the couch, eyes wide.

Colin sighed, wanting to be irritated but not quite able to resist such an earnest entreaty. “It’s not like that,” he said. “Ryan came over last night for a cooking lesson, of all things. It’s kind of a deal we have... never mind. He’s a friend, that’s all, Jamie. Really. Please don’t worry.”

Jamie nodded slowly, settling back on the couch. “And he stayed over because...?”

“Because it was late and we were both tired and it was just simpler. Separate beds, if that makes you feel better,” Colin added.

“It does,” Jamie replied. “Just be careful, okay? I don’t want to tell you what you can and can’t do with your free time but... a little discretion, that’s all I’m asking.”

The bedroom door opened before Colin could reply and Ryan walked out. He’d shaved, but he was wearing the same clothes as yesterday, which made sense, Colin supposed. He had an odd expression on his face, his eyes flicking over Colin before looking away, his hands stuffed deep in his pockets. Colin wondered uneasily how much he’d heard.

“Okay,” Jamie said, bouncing to his feet. “Let’s get going, we have lots to do.” He paused and gave Ryan a nervous smile. “I hope you don’t mind making your own way to the convention center.”

“It’s fine,” Ryan said, at the same time as Colin protested.

“Come on, Jamie, that’s just silly. We’re all going to the same place.”

“And when we get there, you’ll be getting out of the car and going in the front, greeting people all the way in. If he’s in the car with you, they’re going to want to know who he is and why he’s there and it’ll just create problems. You know that, Colin,” he said, crossing his arms, and Colin knew he wasn’t winning this one without a fight.

“But--”

“It’s really okay,” Ryan interrupted, moving to Colin’s side. “Really. Please don’t make a big deal of it; I don’t want to cause any trouble. It’s only a couple blocks.”

Jamie was still giving him a pleading look, but it was the uneasy, embarrassed way Ryan hunched his shoulders that made Colin give in. “Okay,” he sighed, frowning. “If you’d feel more comfortable that way, then it’s fine with me.”

“Great, thank you, you’re the best,” Jamie said rapidly. “But now we really have to go or we’re going to be late and that’ll throw the whole day off kilter.” He tugged Colin out the door and Ryan trailed along after them. Jamie chattered all the way to the car, but Colin tuned him out, watching Ryan walk down the street as they pulled away from the curb. He turned to keep Ryan in sight as the car passed him, and saw Ryan wave just before they turned the corner. Colin lifted a hand in return, knowing Ryan couldn’t see him.

Colin huddled in the back seat, Jamie beside him, still giving him tips on the upcoming shows. He nodded in the right places and wrapped his arms around his middle, trying to quash the growing tension there. They arrived all too quickly and Colin emerged to cheers and outstretched hands, wanting a piece of him. He smiled and waved and wished Ryan was still at his side.

~~~

Colin didn’t see Ryan again until halfway through his second show, when he was just starting to really get into the presentation, the ripples of laughter through the crowd gaining momentum and feeding his own flagging energy. Ryan appeared at the back and slowly threaded his way forward, easily visible because of his greater height. When he got to the front, Colin saw that he must have gone back to his hotel because he was wearing different clothes.

Ryan grinned, and Colin tipped his knife at him, nodding. He looked at the equipment on his counter, then back at Ryan, and had an idea.

“Okay,” he said, spearing a tomato on the end of his knife and flipping it to his other hand. He jumped when it landed neatly in his palm, blade down, the tomato protecting him from being cut, and gave a sheepish grin to the audience, affecting a relieved sigh. They laughed, and he could see Ryan smiling slyly. “For my next trick,” he said, waiting through a few more chuckles, “I’ll need a volunteer.”

Ryan understood immediately, his eyes widening. Colin pretended to scan the crowd as several of them waved their hands and tried to catch his attention. “You!” he said, “the tall guy. The one trying to hide.”

More laughter, and hands nudging Ryan forward as he made a show of reluctance, casting nervous looks at the array of sharp, gleaming knives. Colin held up his chopping knife and Ryan froze, his fearful expression betrayed by his sparkling eyes.

“Is this worrying you?” Colin asked, and Ryan nodded rapidly, drawing more laughs from the crowd. “Here, I’ll just put it down...” Colin gripped the knife by the tip and tossed it expertly at the cutting board, where it stuck, handle quivering visibly. Ryan swallowed and made another mock escape attempt, but allowed himself to be pushed toward the stage.

“All right,” Colin said once Ryan was standing beside him. “When I say anyone can use these knives like a pro, I mean anyone. Even him.” He jerked a thumb over his shoulder at Ryan, and grinned when Ryan poked him in the side, hidden behind the counter.

“Here you are.” Colin handed the small paring knife to Ryan, who held it between thumb and forefinger if it was a dead rodent. It looked like a toy in his huge hand, and he turned toward the audience, acting befuddled. “You’re a natural,” Colin muttered, barely audible under their laughter.

“Now... no, don’t hold it like that,” he said, correcting Ryan’s grip. Ryan let him, then immediately returned to his previous grip once Colin’s back was turned. He held it properly the moment Colin faced him again, giving him a shifty-eyed guilty look. Colin narrowed his eyes suspiciously and handed Ryan a carrot, smacking it into his chest. Ryan looked down at it, then up at Colin, and raised one eyebrow.

“What do you want me to do with it?” he asked, and Colin could hear the teasing, the invitation to carry the joke further. It wasn’t a game Colin would usually play with a guy he’d met less than a week ago, but things were different on stage. He could get away with things, pass them off as jokes; there was room to be daring.

“What do you think?” Colin replied, drawing one corner of his mouth up in a suggestive smile.

“I’m really not that kinky,” Ryan said, and there were several shrieks from the audience.

Colin closed his eyes for a long moment, rubbing his forehead. “Never, ever make me picture that again,” he growled, and Ryan grinned widely, wiggling his eyebrows. “And you’re supposed to slice the carrot.”

Ryan nodded and placed the carrot on the cutting board, then very carefully and slowly cut an eighth-inch sliver from one end. “There!” he said, holding the tiny bit of carrot on the tip of his finger. “Done. Now what?”

Colin clapped a hand over his face and shook his head. “Never mind,” he muttered, inwardly elated at how easy this was. The crowd was laughing and cheering and it came naturally, just like kidding around with Ryan on a flight.

“Here,” Ryan said, and held the knife up as if he was going to throw it to Colin.

“No, no!” Colin held his hands up, shielding himself. “You can keep it. Really.”

“Hey, all right,” Ryan said, grinning at the audience. “Free knife.” He looked around and spotted the juicer sitting to one side. Picking it up, he hefted it in one hand and cocked his arm, aiming at Colin. “How about this? You want this?”

“Give me that,” Colin huffed, snatching it out of his hands. “Thank you, you’ve been great, come back next week.”

“But isn’t the conference over next week?” Ryan asked as Colin pushed him to the edge of the stage.

“Exactly,” Colin muttered darkly, drawing more laughs. Ryan stumbled into the crowd and held his knife up proudly, and they cheered for him, several slapping him on the back.

“When I say anyone can use these,” Colin said, “I mean anyone but him.”

“I still got a free knife,” Ryan taunted, and Colin rolled his eyes.

Ryan stayed near the stage for the rest of the show, occasionally sneaking a hand toward the counter as if he was going to steal something. Colin took to fending him off with a bread knife, stabbing the counter near his fingers more than once, raising an excited ‘oooooh’ from the audience every time. The presentation flew by, and after Colin had handed out samples and thanked the crowd, they dispersed, leaving Ryan lingering at the edge of the stage.

“Here,” Ryan said, holding the knife out, handle first this time.

“Thanks.” Colin slid it into the butcher’s block with the others, then walked around the back of the stage, ducking into a small alcove that was mostly used for storage. Ryan followed him, and they each sat on a crate. The air was pleasantly scented with the big bag of fresh oranges nearby, and there was a chilled bucket of prepared dough lending a touch of yeasty flour to the atmosphere. Ryan took a deep breath, smiling, and Colin watched him.

“You surprised me,” Ryan said. “I didn’t know you did stuff like that, where you took volunteers.”

“I don’t,” Colin replied. “But I thought... I just figured you could handle it.”

“Hmm.” Ryan nodded, glancing out toward the corner of stage visible from the little room. “It was fun, actually. Kind of exciting. I can see why you like the job.”

“Yeah, it has its moments. Of course, it’s a lot easier with someone to joke with, instead of just trying to do everything on my own. And I meant what I said earlier--you really are a natural. You ever done performance work before?”

Ryan shrugged, shaking his head. “Not really. Nothing serious, just goofing around type stuff. I mean, I’m usually the cutup when the family gets together, and I like making people laugh, but it’s not like I have any formal training or anything.”

“Well, you were great,” Colin said, elbowing him in the side. “We should do that again sometime.”

“Yeah,” Ryan replied quietly. “I’d like that.”

They sat for a few minutes in companionable silence, Colin enjoying the chance to relax between shows, Ryan’s presence a soothing influence. “Hey,” he said eventually, “sorry about this morning. Jamie showing up and, you know, everything.”

“It’s okay.” Ryan waved dismissively. “I, uh... I kinda heard you guys talking, though.”

“Oh,” Colin said, looking down at his hands. Here it was, then. “And?”

“It was kind of funny, him thinking... you know. No wonder he had such a weird look on his face when I opened the door.”

Colin chuckled, nodding. “Yeah, he tends to leap to conclusions sometimes.”

“But you set him straight. Told him we were just friends.”

There was something strange about Ryan’s voice and Colin turned, looking at him carefully. “Right. I mean... that is right, isn’t it? I know we haven’t known each other very long, but I thought with everything...” Colin trailed off, feeling his face beginning to heat up.

“No, no, I didn’t... of course we’re friends,” Ryan said quickly. “I mean, that’s what I figured, it’s just some of the other stuff... there’s other stuff. That’s all.”

“Other... stuff,” Colin repeated slowly.

Ryan shifted his feet, scuffing them along the floor, avoiding Colin’s gaze. “I didn’t know,” he muttered. “That you... I mean, I got the impression from what Jamie said that you have company sometimes. Like, other guys type company.”

“Ah, that.” Colin took a deep breath, blowing it out slowly. “Well, yes. I do sometimes have... company. Like that. But I’m not trying to... I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable, okay? I’m not assuming anything here. It’s just cooking lessons, right?”

Ryan was quiet for a long moment, and then he lifted his head, giving Colin a steady, open look. “Right. I guess I just wanted to tell you it’s fine. I mean, I’m not going to be all weird about it or anything.”

Colin smiled at the earnest words and leaned closer, letting their sides bump together. Ryan didn’t try to pull back and he looked completely at ease, which reassured Colin more than anything he’d said. “So, does that mean you want another lesson tonight? With actual food this time.”

“Sure,” Ryan said. “What are we making?”

“Ah, ah,” Colin scolded, shaking his finger at Ryan. “That would be telling. You’ll just have to be surprised.”

Ryan smiled at him. “I like surprises.”

~~~

On to part 6