[identity profile] rushlight75.livejournal.com posting in [community profile] wl_fanfiction
Title: Showstopper
Author: Rushlight
Fandom: Whose Line Is It Anyway?
Pairings: various, but mainly Ryan/Colin
Rated: R
Summary: The Whose Line episode you'll never see.
Warning: The author has a deranged sense of humor. Proceed at your own peril. ^_^


"Hey! Welcome to Whose Line Is It, Anyway?, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter."

Ryan sat in his chair at the back of the stage and let the applause and cheers of the audience wash through him. He caught Colin's eye briefly and smothered a grin, feeling the usual adrenaline buzz singing underneath his skin. It had been years since he'd had anything resembling performance anxiety, but there was still a kind of tension as they were getting ready to start a show, an excitement that made the lights seem brighter, the sounds more piercing than they would have been otherwise. He was vaguely aware of Drew sitting in his usual spot at the edge of the stage, of Greg and Wayne sitting further down past Colin's chair, but everything else was distant, hazy, a blur of light and noise and color that seemed less real than the pastel backdrop of the stage behind him.

"First game of the evening," Drew announced, holding up his cue card and stifling a chuckle, "is for Ryan, Colin, Wayne, and Greg. It's called Hollywood Director. Wayne, you're the director. You'll give direction to the other three as they act out the scene."

Ryan shared a bemused glance with Colin as they moved down toward the center of the stage. Part of him wondered why Wayne was being given Colin's usual role in this game, but the larger part of him just sat back and went with the flow. He felt strange tonight, buzzed in a way that had nothing to do with the leering crowd. Colin held his gaze and grinned.

They fell into the scene Drew laid out for them without much thought, responding to one another with the comfort and familiarity of years of being partnered together. The crowd was wired tonight, screaming with laughter at every line, making Ryan's adrenaline level soar. He was almost resentful when Wayne called out for them to stop the scene, stomping in with Colin's usual flair for the overdramatic to tell them to try it another way.

"You," Wayne said, pointing at Greg. "Try playing the scene as a ballet dancer. And you," he whirled on Ryan and Colin, "I want you to read your lines like you've fallen madly in love with each other." His expression was sternly uncompromising, a comical effort to mimic Colin's usual demeanor as the temperamental Hollywood director. "I'm talking kissing, you two. With tongue!"

Ryan chuckled in surprise, only half-hearing the wild catcalls of the crowd. Glancing at Colin, he saw his friend still grinning, rocking back on his heels and looking totally at ease. Not one to be outdone in the weirdness department, Ryan gave a mental shrug and decided to enjoy the ride.

The first brush of Colin's lips across his made him draw in a startled breath. Sure, he'd kissed Colin before on stage -- maybe even enjoyed it a little -- but this was different. Colin's eyes glittered a challenge at him, and Ryan dipped his head down to steal another kiss, feeling a wild recklessness sing underneath his skin. Colin's mouth tasted like breath mints.

"No, no, no!" Wayne shouted, tromping back onto the stage. "I want to see more emotion, gentlemen! More emotion!" He waved his hands in the air in exaggerated frustration. "What does it take to get a genuine orgy going out here?"

The crowd went wild.

Ryan glanced at Colin and saw him fighting back a grin, waiting for him to make the next move. Looking around, he saw that Greg was still practicing demi-pliés at the edge of the stage, while Jeff and Chip were clinched in an enthusiastic liplock on the lower step. Ryan wondered fleetingly when the two of them had shown up, but his attention was diverted when Colin grabbed hold of him and quite energetically stuck his tongue in his mouth.

The kiss seemed to go on forever. The roar of the crowd faded into a background hum, vibrating the stage under his feet, the air around his ears, becoming an entity as detached and inconsequential as the audience itself. Colin was a better kisser than Ryan had ever imagined he'd be -- not that he'd ever imagined such a thing, and even if he had, it certainly wouldn't be taking place under circumstances remotely similar to these.

A quick glance showed Wayne in leather chaps and not much else, leading a half-naked Greg around the stage. Greg was on his hands and knees, looking surly in a leather hat that looked remarkably similar to the one he'd worn during the Village People song they'd sung together during the last show. There was a leather bit clenched tightly between his teeth, with Wayne holding the reins. As Ryan watched, Wayne used the end of one long, trailing rein to slap Greg playfully across the backside.

Jeff and Chip were making out with gusto now, shedding clothes and inhibitions alike as they necked on the stair leading up to the back of the stage. Brad, armed with a disturbingly supple-looking leather whip, shouted a hearty "Yee-HAH!" and ran after Greg and Wayne.

"What the hell?" Ryan said, feeling utterly confused. Colin grabbed his chin in one hand and gently turned his face away from the highly pornographic spectacle playing out around them.

"Let them have their fun," Colin said, holding Ryan's gaze. His eyes looked suddenly sensuous in a way that made Ryan's mouth go dry.

"Scenes From a Hat," Drew announced, apropos of nothing. Flicking his cue card with dramatic flair, he said, "A lustful reunion between two star-crossed lovers. Ryan and Colin, take it away."

"Yeah," Ryan said, and bent down to kiss Colin again.

There was the crack of a whip and a high-pitched squeal from Greg, followed by the impassioned shout of "More, MORE!" from Chip, but none of it meant anything to Ryan. There was only Colin -- the feel of strong arms around him, pulling him down onto the stage, the compact, wiry body pressing up against him, the familiar smell and feel of his best friend, coupled with the entirely new sensation of lips he'd only dreamed about tracing over his skin. Out of the corner of his eye, he saw Jeff and Chip locked in a position he hadn't even known was possible.

The approving roar of the crowd felt like a second heartbeat shuddering through him, driving him onward, giving him life as surely as the heart that pushed blood through his veins. Then there was only the awareness of kissing Colin, of being kissed by Colin, of being held and stroked and filled with a sharp sense of want that he'd never known before. Warm mouth... wet tongue... soft lips... and it was so hot, so sweet, so good, and they were kissing, and touching... and... and....

* * * *

...and the alarm went off. Jerking awake abruptly, Ryan slapped a hand over the snooze button and covered his eyes with a groan. Sunlight filtered in through the blinds of his hotel room, falling square on the king-sized bed where he slept alone.

Colin, he knew, would interpret this dream to mean that he had repressed issues he wasn't addressing. Wayne would spin an elaborate story that tied back to his mother and the erroneous assumption that he'd never had enough affection as a child. Drew would say it meant he was fucked in the head. To Ryan, all it meant was that his subconscious was weirder than even he gave it credit for.

"That," he said, flopping back onto his pillow, "is the last time I have Thai before going to bed."

Closing his eyes, he rolled over and went back to sleep.

The End
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