Between the Devil and the Deep Blue Sea Chap 6/18

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A/N: Hey there,

To the heart of the matter, I suppose I'm clogging the comm, but I also believe it's because I didn't sign up in time for the Secret Santa stuffs, thus my time is freed up. So here's the Unofficial Secret Santa Commercials brought to you by the Captain and PD, bringing you these messages...

stay tuned and find out if Fabia is really carrying Juanito's baby, or if it's a alien chicken with a rare subtropical disease...

Kthxbai

Us



Chapter 6

His dreams were filled with Ryan. Ryan on the boat, Ryan in the water, Ryan in nothing but shorts… he awoke with a gasp, just as dream-Ryan was about to step into the shower with him. Crap… he switched off his alarm and lay back on his pillow again, thinking about his dreams.

He felt a twinge of guilt for dreaming about Ryan like that. The guy was straight, his friends had said so. He should be relieved Ryan had agreed to the research trip and maybe, just maybe, they could become friends. Stupid Greg for putting ideas into my head about lube and condoms…yeah…like that was going to happen…I don’t even have lube and condoms anymore… Do I? He scratched his head and went to look for them. Nothing under the bed, nothing in the bedside drawer… He padded into the bathroom and checked the bathroom cabinet… Nothing in there either… Maybe I should go and buy some .just in case… In case of what? You get Ryan so drunk he forgets who he’s with? Or are you counting on the fact that he probably gets it every night and three weeks without it might make him less picky about who he sleeps with?

He decided the best thing was to not think about lube and condoms and to just have a shower. He was supposed to pick Ryan up at 7, so he only had an hour and he still needed to pack. He wasn’t panicking quite yet, but he had a feeling it wouldn’t take much for him to go into full-fret mode.

After his shower, he wrapped a towel around his waist and walked over to his wardrobe to start the packing process. Looking at his clothes made him question his sexuality all over again. Weren’t gay men supposed to be snazzy dressers? He didn’t think he had one fashionable item in there… Everything was so… so… drab! He might have to do some last minute shopping at the airport… Yeah, because that’s really going to impress Ryan.

He selected the least awful clothes and put them in his bag. He hardly went anywhere anymore these days and, apart from the fear of making a total idiot out of himself in front of Ryan, he was quite looking forward to this. He had always liked research trips, he just didn’t fancy doing it alone. He wondered if Ryan ever went anywhere. Probably not anywhere that you needed to fly to… He had looked decidedly uncomfortable when LAX had been mentioned last night. Maybe he should buy him some anti-anxiety meds for the flight, but he didn’t want to come across as patronizing. Ryan had clearly wanted to hide the fact he was nervous about flying. Hmmm, he could always pretend he’d bought them for himself and then offer one to Ryan.

He was about to leave when he realized he didn’t have Ryan’s address… Greg, Greg would know, he took him home last night! He went to pick up the phone to call Greg when he saw the light on his answering machine flicker. That’s strange, he hadn’t heard the phone at all… That’s probably because you were so out of it last night… He pressed play and gasped in shock when he heard Ryan’s voice.

“Hi, it’s me…eh… Ryan. Professor Proops, sorry, Greg, just dropped me off but eh… he told me that I need to ring you because you wouldn’t have my address and…eh… well…anyway…I live at 4875 W. Acacia Drive off of 89th. I’ll wait for you outside. See you tomorrow sir… eh, sorry… Colin…”

Even though it was just a simple message, it reduced him to jelly. Ryan’s voice had that effect on him. How the hell are you going to cope for three weeks on a boat with him? He wasn’t sure but he figured he’d find out soon enough…He took one last look around his apartment before he closed the door behind him. Then he changed his mind, unlocked the door, went back in and retrieved the tape from his answering machine. He put it the inside pocket of his jacket and put a new tape in the machine. Patting his pocket, he went back out and locked the door.

Traffic had not really started, so he made it to Ryan’s in good time. As he pulled into the parking lot, he saw Ryan sitting on the steps to the apartment building, his left knee bouncing up and down at an alarming rate and a well worn duffel bag at his side.

Colin pulled over in front of him and leant over to open the door. “Hi.”

“Hi,” Ryan pointed to his bag. “Where do you want me to put this?”

“On the backseat is fine,”

Once he had deposited his bag, Ryan folded himself in the passenger seat, refusing to look Colin in the eye. Damn… he hates this trip… he hates me for forcing him… Colin started to panic. This was going all wrong!

He turned to Ryan “Look, you don’t have to come you know… I... Greg should never have done what he did… and I’m sorry.” It sounded pathetic, even to his own ears.

“No, it’s fine… it’s not you…” Ryan said, looking out the car window.

“So you’ve told me before,”

“Well, I’m telling you again, it isn’t you,” Colin flushed at Ryan’s sharp tone. Ryan sighed. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it like that. I just…” He dragged his hand through his hair again, “I just- I can’t compare with you… I’m a highschool drop out…a janitor… you… you’re a professor-”

He would have continued if Colin hadn’t interrupted him. “Stop it… if you don’t want to come, you don’t want to come, but stop holding the fact that I am a professor against me. I can’t help it. It doesn’t define who I am. I just want to be your friend. If you don’t want that, tell me and I will consider the matter closed.”

“Sorry… I promised Greg I wouldn’t be like this. He threatened me with cruel and unusual punishment if I pulled this ‘class shit’ as he called it. What do you think he would do?”

“With Greg, you never know…” Colin smiled, pulling out onto the 101.

“Yeah, he strikes me as an inventive little fucker…” Ryan said, before flushing and realizing what he’d said. “Sorry, shouldn’t have said that about your colleague,”

Colin just sniggered. “Nope, I think you hit the nail on the head. Once he had an intern pull out jellyfish samples with his bare hands and the guy fainted even though the jellies in question weren’t poisonous,” Ryan laughed, and Colin, emboldened by his small success, continued telling Ryan about the many ways in which Greg had tormented obnoxious interns.

Tears of laughter were streaming down Ryan’s face when they got to LAX and Colin felt a lot better. This was how he imagined it could be between them, just easy camaraderie… Yeah, and the fact that you wanted to bend him over his own trolley and… He clamped down before he could finish the thought… Don’t ruin this! He could be your friend!

He parked the car and they made their way over to the terminal to find the check-in desk. Much to their surprise there wasn’t much of a queue and before they knew it, they had their boarding pass and were making their way through customs.

Ryan had started to look nervous again and Colin could swear he turned a little green around the gills at the sight of the aircraft taxiing to and from the gates.

“Look, I’ve got some last minute things to get. You want to stay here and meet up later?”

“Nah, I’ll come with you…” Shit... how was he going to buy The Essentials…He could hardly buy them with Ryan looking on. The idea alone made him flush in embarrassment.

“OK….”

“What do you need?”

“Eh, some shirts….and eh…some stuff for the flight…”

“What do you want to get first?”

“Shirts, probably,”

“Let’s go…” and off they went. Shopping with Ryan proved to be an unexpected pleasure. He had an eye for color and shape and things that Colin would never have considered wearing when he saw the on the hanger, actually looked a lot better on him once he had them on. He got everything he needed in the first shop, and it was mainly due to Ryan.

Laden with bags, they made their way to one of the drugstores. Just as they were about to go in, Ryan felt his back pocket. “Damn… I think I’ve lost my wallet…”

“Oh no! Let’s retrace our steps, maybe we’ll find it…”

“No! It’s fine…eh…you go in here and get what you need and I’ll… eh…I’ll meet you back here in ten minutes, ok? I’ll go and look for it myself.” Colin looked over at Ryan. It sounded a bit weird… and was he blushing?

“OK… see you back here in ten…” he said, to Ryan’s retreating back. Colin wanted to crow with glee. Now he could get The Essentials!

Ten minutes later, with certain purchases safely ensconced in his hand luggage, Colin met up with Ryan again outside the store. “Any luck?”

“Yeah, I hadn’t lost it after all, I put it the pocket of my jacket.” Ryan said sheepishly. Just then their flight was announced and they were requested to make their way to the gate. Ryan flinched.

“Wait…” Colin said, fishing around in his pocket.

“What?”

“I’ve got to take these. For the flight. Nerves, you know…” he waved the box in front of Ryan’s nose.

“Oh…ok…”

“Do you need any?”

“Eh… nah… I’ll be alright…” Colin knew Ryan was trying to put up a brave front, and he thought it was adorable.

“Ok, if you’re sure… but they always help me sleep and it was early this morning…” He tried again.

“Oh, well… in that case… you’re right, it was early.” Ryan yawned, as if to emphasize the early start. He took two tablets off Colin and swallowed them in one go… Colin was mesmerized by the bobbing of Ryan’s Adam’s apple as he swallowed. He realized he was staring when Ryan raised an eyebrow. “You alright?”

“Yeah, yeah…sorry. Miles away- Let’s get to the gate,”

Ryan was nervous as they waited in the port outside the gate. Ryan was a little less nervous as they boarded the flight, and when they finally got tucked into their seats at the very front of the coach passengers, Ryan stretched out his legs and tucked in for a long sleep, snoring and rivaling the engines behind them.

Colin grinned, pulling out his reading glasses and his favorite book, The Stainless Steel Rat Wants You, tucking in for a nice long flight, more often looking over and watching Ryan than reading the pages in front of him.

I guess the sugar pills really do work. Colin chuckled gently as the plane took off, enjoying the feel of the g-forces, like a gentle hand, pressing him back in to his seat and the plane almost gliding like a leaf into the sky. He looked past Ryan to watch the Earth fall away and they sailed up into the clouds, past the layers of fluff to the wisps and over, the sunlight clear and twinkling as they rose above LA’s smog.

He reached over and pulled the shutter down to shield Ryan from the harsh glare and settled back in with his books, a bottle of water placed in his hand by a flight attendant.

About halfway through the second chapter, Ryan had shifted to using Colin’s shoulder as a pillow, sending warmth up his neck. Colin smiled, flushing faintly with pleasure. Then Ryan shifted again, snuffling Colin’s neck. He froze as Ryan lipped at the sensitive skin there, squeezing his eyes shut and forcibly willing himself not to make known how much he was actually enjoying this. He shifted, and Ryan groaned, frowning in his sleep and shifting over to rest his head against the wall of the plane.

Colin let out a breath he hadn’t known he’d been holding and sighed.

That had felt too good.