Springtime In Arcadia [Secret Santa Fic]

[mizzmeow.livejournal.com]

Springtime In Arcadia
Pairing(s): Colin/Ryan; Greg/Jeff; Drew/Chip
Rating: PG-13
Written by: mizzmeow 
Secret Santa story for: katri_katri 
Author’s Notes: Alternate Universe/ Time. Just Fuzzy Crackfic Humor. I randomly chose ten words out of the dictionary, and will attempt to include all ten words in this story in some form. The words: 1. Arcadia 2. goggled 3. slipsoles 4. Meadowlands 5. Helena 6. kidnapped 7. Kiev 8. hoard 9. owlish 10. cardholder
Summary: Sir Colin of Mochrie and his seneschal Gregory of Proops go on a grand adventure to the colorful land of Arcadia, where Sir Colin finds love.
Disclaimer: I do not own or know the people in this story. This story is purely fictional and is written only for fun. I have no money. Please don’t sue me.

X-posted at bythewayiluvyou

~*~*~

“Look, Sir Colin of Mochrie! It’s the land of Arcadia! Let’s go to the fair land to see what we can see!”

“You don’t fool me, Gregory of Proops. I know why you want to visit Arcadia. It’s the land where Young Jeff of Davis resides. I know that you’re smitten with Young Jeff, and have been since he visited our fair Meadowlands.”

Greg grumbled something inaudible, but said nothing else as Sir Colin and he stopped pedaling their tandem bicycle to rest. Sir Colin caught sight of a giant blue building, and goggled at it for a moment.

“What in the Hell is that blue eyesore?” he asked squinting at the bright blue color.

“That’s the House Of Stiles.”

“If that’s what the outside of the house looks like, I don’t want to see the inside. Who would name a building of that color stylish?”

Greg chortled. “No, Col. Not styles with a ‘Y’. S-T-I-L-E-S. It’s the home of Sir Ryan of Stiles. And if you think his home is an eyesore, you should see his footwear!”

“And how is it you know Sir Stiles?”

“I met him when we were both performing for Lords Clive of Anderson and Dan of Patterson.”

“That’s right. You were overseas in the Land of Funneh for nine seasons.” Dismounting the tandem bike, Sir Colin and Greg began to walk to the gates of Arcadia.

“Yes. It was at the same time you were traveling with the Naive Brad of Sherwood. I still don’t know why you traveled with him. You should have come to Funneh with me. Lords Clive and Dan would be impressed with your humor.”

“I have a lot of respect for Lords Clive and Dan, but you know how I get seasick. I would never have lasted the boat ride.” Sir Colin ignored the eye roll he received from his friend, as they at last approached the gates to Arcadia.

“Who approaches the high gates of Arcadia, yo?” Greg shook his head, and raised his hand in a one fingered gesture. Colin slapped his hand down, and smiled politely.

“I’m Sir Colin of Mochrie, from the Meadowlands, and this is my seneschal Gregory of Proops. We’re visiting your fair land of Arcadia. May I ask who you are?”

“I’m Wayne of Brady, the keeper of the high gates and protector of the overused word ‘Because’.” Wayne eyed Greg suspiciously, but didn’t say anything about Greg’s one fingered salute.

“Why do you feel the need to protect the overused word ‘Because’?” Colin didn’t know why, but he had to know.

“Because.” Wayne said nothing more, but granted that they may enter through the high gates. Greg exchanged looks with Colin.

“I suppose that makes you the protector of the overused word ‘Really’.” he mumbled in Colin’s ear.

“Really?” Greg didn’t say a word, taking his punishment because he had provoked it.

Arcadia was vibrant with color. Bright green grasses and multi-colored flowers adorned the parks and yards of the town, and Colin who was dressed all in black felt quite plain indeed. Even his footwear was black and white, though the slipsoles were a bright red. Greg too was dressed all in black, with the exception of his tinted eyewear and his dark purple necktie.

“I feel like a dead plant in this garden of color,” Colin whispered to Greg as they walked across the street. “You, at least, have some color in your wardrobe, my friend.”

“You shouldn’t worry about that, Col. As good as you look in black, no one is going to notice you have no other colors on.” Greg patted Colin on the ass, as they both narrowly missed being run over by a puddle jumper zooming down the lane. “Idiot driver!! Get some fucking glasses!!”

Colin chuckled. “You’d think he would have noticed us, we stick out like a couple of sore thumbs.”

Before Greg could comment, they were hailed. “Gregory of Proops! Sir Colin of Mochrie! What brings you to fair Arcadia?” They turned to see who was addressing them, and both smiled at the familiar face.

“Charles of Esten! It’s been far too long!” Colin clasped hands with Chip, his smile blinding. “I had no idea that you were living in Arcadia! Has Lord Drew of Carey come to live here as well?”

“You mean, are we still together?” Chip said with a smirk. Colin blushed, but did not answer. “Forgive my teasing. I just enjoy the way you wear the color pink when you’re embarrassed.”

“Some things will never change,” Greg laughed, amused.

“Yes, Lord Drew and I moved to Arcadia when the winters in Helena became too harsh. Drew doesn’t mind the cold, but he prefers the rains to the bitter snows.”

“I understand that one of Drew’s hosting projects was canceled. I hope that he didn’t take it badly.”

“Oh, not at all. In fact, I think he was glad. Hosting one project on a daily basis is a lot more work than most would think.”

“Yes, I hosted a project last season, and it was a hell of a lot of work.” Colin remembered how glad he was when his was over. He had enjoyed it immensely, but was most glad when he was done with it.

“You haven’t yet told me what brings you from the Meadowlands to Arcadia.”

“Boredom,” Greg answered simply.

“Young Jeff of Davis,” Colin corrected, grinning at his friend.

Chip’s interest piqued, he looked over at Colin. “Really?”

“Yes, Greg got the hots for Young Jeff, when he visited us last summer season.”

“I did not!”

“Me thinks he doth protest too much,” Chip teased. “Why Gregory, you’re blushing! Such a rare thing to see Sir Snark flustered!”

“If you aren’t careful, you might find yourself on the receiving end of Sir Snark’s tongue,” Colin warned.

“Are you going to Sir Ryan of Stiles’s Spring Season Celebration tonight?” Chip asked as they walked in the park.

“Spring Celebration? We only just arrived, and I wasn’t aware of a Celebration. And I expect an invitation to such an event is needed.” It was after his statement that Colin noticed Greg looking guiltily at his shoes. “Something wrong, Greg?”

“I had motives other than boredom, or Jeff for coming here.” Reaching into his coat pocket, Greg searched for a moment, then pulled out an envelope. Colin blinked owlishly at Greg for a moment, then sighed.

“This little trip was planned, wasn’t it? This was the reason you wanted to come to Arcadia.”

“Guilty as charged. I really just wanted you to meet Ryan. I think you’ll like him.”

“If you’re trying to play matchmaker again, so help me…”

“I’m not. Honest. But…”

Colin stopped walking and crossed his arms over his chest. “But what, Greg?”

“It’s a color Celebration.”

“But I didn’t bring anything with color! Greg, sometimes I think you get off on sabotaging me.”

“But I’ve made special arrangements with Steven of Frost. He’s got some clothes with color ready for you.

“Who is Steven of Frost?”

“Arcadia’s tailor. Your fitting is in twenty minutes.”

Colin shook his head in resignation. “Sometimes, I wish you would just tell me things instead of pulling this shit.”

“Does this mean you’ll go?”

“Well, since I’ve been railroaded into it, I suppose it’s better than sitting around staring at each other.” Colin pointedly ignored Greg’s smug look.

~*~

Sir Ryan of Stiles wondered how it was that he let Lord Drew and Chip talk him into this Celebration. He wasn’t much on them in the first place. And what got him more was that it was a color Celebration. They all lived in Arcaida, the most colorful city in the land. Why have a Celebration of color? But his friends had their hearts set on it, and he didn’t want to spoil their fun.

The truth be told, he wished he had someone, like Drew and Chip had each other. He didn’t suppose he’d meet anyone at the Celebration, he was pretty sure he would know everyone there. He always did. Looking over the vast quantity of colorful shirts in his closet, he decided on one of his many green ones. He was pulling it out, when Jeff of Davis strolled in.

“On, not that one. You should wear your canary yellow shirt, with the eggshell blue tie to match your shoes.”

“Are you my fashion consultant now?”


“Well, it is a Celebration of color. You can wear your green shirts any old day. Besides, maybe you‘ll find someone you’ll want to impress tonight.”

Ryan suspected he was being set up, but didn’t say anything. “Alright, Jeff. I’ll wear the canary yellow shirt. I hope you plan on wearing something more colorful than your usual black and white.”

“Black and white are colors, you know. Actually, I’m planning on wearing something blue.”

“Yeah, Greg likes you in blue.”

“What’s that supposed to mean? Are you suggesting that Greg likes me? Do you know something I don’t know? And if you’re suggesting that I’m only wearing blue because I like Greg, that isn’t true. I only like Greg if he likes me.”

Ryan had to sit down, before he fell down laughing. “You sound like a teenage girl!”

“Okay, that was slightly immature. But, I’m not wearing blue, just because Greg will be there.”

Ryan wiped the tears of laughter from his eyes, and got to his feet again. “Look, why don’t the two of you do us all a favor and just hook up at the party tonight.”

“We might just do that. Can we use your bed?”

“Would you please get out of here.”

***

“I’m not so sure about this sweater, Greg.” Colin subconsciously smoothed the sleeves down for the hundredth time. “It’s the color women wear.”

“Oh would you stop. It’s not exclusively a woman’s color, and you look sexy. So stop with the self-conscious act already.”

“It’s like Steve saw me coming or something.”

“Steve did see you coming. I called him, remember?”

“Oh yeah..”

They approached the bright blue building, and Colin was very grateful that it was dark now, so the color wasn’t as overwhelming. Though he did wonder why anyone would want to paint any building that color was beyond him, but he supposed that wasn’t any of his business. And he didn’t have to live there.

They were escorted into the building, and Colin suddenly wished he had thought to bring his sunglasses. Most of the Celebration goers were dressed in some of the most brightly colored clothing he had ever seen in his life. And he had seen a lot in his life.

“Just give your eyes a moment to adjust, and it won’t hurt so much.”

“It looks like a pallet of finger paints exploded in here, Greg.” Colin whispered.

“Well, it is a Celebration of color. Can’t celebrate color without color.”

“These people give the word ‘color’ a new definition.”

Greg only smiled and took Colin by the elbow. “I can see Ryan. Come on, I want you to meet him.”

Colin was led to an alcove in the room, that was scattered with colorful pillows and streamers, and a small group of people. Colin recognized Chip and Drew, he saw Lady Josie of Lawrence, Denny of Siegel, Karen of Maruyama and Lady Kathy of Kinney, and rather tall gentleman he assumed to be Sir Ryan of Stiles.

And indeed he was correct in that assumption. He tried not to stare too hard, as Greg introduced them to each other. Colin didn’t know what it was about this tall man, but he found him to be utterly charming, in a gawky sort of way. Colin, who was not a short man himself, felt slightly intimidated by Ryan’s height, but even more so by his heated gaze.

Eyes as green as emerald, swept up and down his body, several times, and none to discretely either. Colin felt as though he was being hoarded by the intense eyes, and couldn’t help but blush, which only seemed to encourage Ryan to take another look. The rest of the room and the rest of the world seemed to have disappeared, as the two men regarded each other. Colin, embarrassed as he was, decided that if Ryan could gawk then it was fair for him to do the same.

He didn’t much care for the canary yellow shirt the other man wore, but it offset his choice of necktie nicely, so Colin easily forgave the loud color. His slacks were tan and well tailored to suit his extremely long legs, and his shoes… Colin nearly swallowed his tongue when he caught sight of Ryan’s feet. Not necessarily because of the size of his feet, (and they were very large) but the color of the shoes! As blue as the outside of the house!

When Ryan spoke, it startled Colin in to looking back up into those eyes again. “You should always wear that color blue. You were born to wear that sweater.”

Colin sputtered stupidly, trying to make his tongue work properly. “Th-thanks. I actually prefer to wear black. It’s more slimming.”

“I wouldn’t change a thing about you.”

“I… Uh…” Throwing caution to the wind, Colin spoke his mind too. “You’re not so bad yourself. But you should wear more green. It goes better with your eyes.” He couldn’t help but blush again, at Ryan’s delighted smile.

Greg, who had been engrossed in a conversation with Drew and Kathy, broke into the mutual admiration society. “Hey, Ry? Is Jeff around here somewhere?”

As if on cue, Jeff appeared at Greg’s shoulder. “Did I hear my name?” His smile oozed charm as he batted his lashes at Greg.

“You have an incredible sense of hearing.”

“I have a lot of other incredible qualities too.”

“You’ll have to show me!”

Ryan gave Jeff a warning look. “Just stay out of my bedroom.” He slipped an arm around Colin’s shoulders and excused them from the growing crowd. “If you’ll excuse us, I’m going to kidnap, Sir Colin, here and get to know him better.” And Colin was swept out of the large room onto a quiet balcony, relieved to be out of the crowd, and nervous to be in the company of this man he felt drawn instantly to.

“Thanks. I really hate big crowds, unless I’m performing in front of them.”

“So do I,” Ryan chuckled. “If Drew, Chip, Greg and Jeff hadn’t talked me into it, I never would have had this thing. Of course, if I hadn’t, I wouldn’t have met you.”

“I have a feeling that was the whole point of this Celebration. Greg is forever trying to play matchmaker for me.”

“He and Drew have been at me for months too.” They shared a quiet smile that didn’t need words, and looked out over the garden that was lighted with festive colors for the occasion. “Colin?”

“Hmm?”

“Do you believe in love at first site?”

“It’s not unheard of.”

“I know, but do you believe in it?”

“I didn’t before, but tonight, I’ll believe in just about anything. Greg is a nosy buttinski and doesn’t know when to quit half of the time, but I think he managed to make the right call this time.”

“He’s the cardholding leader of the Buttinski Club. But you’re absolutely right. He made the right call.” Ryan slid closer to Colin until their shoulders bumped, and he slipped his arm around his waist. “I know we’ve only know each other for all of ten minutes, but I’d really love to kiss you now.”

“Well, then by all means, please kiss me.”

“Are you sure about this?”

“I’m not usually one who does things like this on the spur of the moment, I save that for the stage, but I’ve been feeling slightly less than normal for the last ten minutes. And I’m positive I want to kiss you.” Colin turned in Ryan’s embrace, and slipped his arms around his slim waist. Ryan cupped his face in huge hands and brought their lips together in a chaste kiss. Electricity shot through both of them, and the kiss deepened as the world around them once again disappeared.

Watching surreptitiously from the double doors of the patio, Greg and Jeff shook hands, matching evil grin for evil grin. “This calls for a private Celebration of our own,” Jeff whispered suggestively.

“Mm hmm. In Ryan’s bedroom?”

“What are we, stupid? No, I’ve got some Chicken Kiev in the oven at my place. Which is conveniently right next door. We can have a nice supper, and then discuss what to have for dessert.” Greg leered at his soon to be lover, as they walked toward the front door.

Sometimes you need to celebrate the colors in your life.

The End?