She Can't Have You - Part 4

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Part 4, not sure how many I'll be writing, but I doubt that many more. Feedback appreciated, as this is my first fan thingy!

Title: She Can't Have You
Pairing: Colin/Ryan
Rating: NC-17 (I promise that I will stop writing sex.)
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em, and I now only own 6 cigarettes. Bad times :(

She Can't Have You - Part 4

April, 1987

"Happy Birthday old man!"

"Fuck you Col."

The two friends smiled at each other. The last year had been a rollercoaster for them both. Ryan had left in the morning, that first night that they had spent together. Both men were confused with what they had discovered, so Ryan had gone to give them time to figure out what they were going to do, with promises of calling Colin later. In typical Ryan fashion, he didn't, instead arriving the night after to inform him that he had patched things up with Pat, and was leaving for Toronto, although he did not want to forget what had happened between them. However, to give them the best chance of getting into comedy, they decided to attempt to ignore the feelings between them, and continue on as normal. Colin has then said a tearful goodbye to an equally distraught Ryan. It was the hardest thing either men had ever done. They kept in regular contact, although Pat still emitted coldness every time Colin phoned up asking to talk to Ryan. He could always hear Ryan in the background asking if it was Colin phoning, his excitement pouring over the phone. The day that Colin had phoned up to inform him that he had got into Second City, they had stayed on the phone for three hours, racking up a phone bill that Colin couldn't afford to pay. When he got over to Toronto, Ryan was there at the airport to greet him, hugging him and giving a quick kiss while Pat was looking in the opposite direction. Ryan was there when Colin moved into his apartment, helping him unpack all the things. They made magic on stage together, winning audiences over with a small eyebrow lift, or a funny face. Ryan was there when Colin asked Deb out on a date. Colin was there when Ryan started acting funny around them, as though he couldn't stand them being together. Colin was there when him and Pat broke up for the twentieth time, only to see them get back together. Their love for each other lay hidden, both scared of what would happen if they gave into it. Both of them knew that what they felt for each other would be more than anything that would ever feel for everyone else. But they couldn't do it.


Ryan stood in the middle of the room, surrounding by his friend and a mountain of presents. There was one present he really wanted however. He opened everything else, so it could be the last one he opened. He turned to Colin.

"So what did you get me?"

"I got you..... me!"

Ryan, stood, shocked. "What?"

"I'm joking. I got you a new pair of shoes. I had to get them done by a specialist since you've got the biggest feet in existence."

"My feet are a thing of beauty I'll have you know."

"Sure. Shut up and open your present."

Ryan unwrapped his gift like a child at Christmas to unearth a pair of Nike trainers, to replace an old pair that he had when he was a teenager. Close to tears, Ryan managed to regain control and hug Colin. He had mentioned to Colin once, drunk, that he had had a pair of Nike trainers when he was younger which he loved, only to come home one day to find that his mother had thrown them out. He was amazed that Colin has remembered something like that.

"Thank you." He whispered.

"No problem." Colin whispered back.

They broke apart, ignoring the stares of the people around them. Pat and Deb knew how close they were, and excused their behaviour as happiness. How wrong they were. Staring into his green eyes, Colin could see the love Ryan had for him threatening to burst to the surface. Ryan could see the same thing in Colin's eyes. They had to get out of the room, fast.

"D'you want a birthday smoke Ry?"

"Yeah. Sounds good."

They ran out of the house without giving an explanation of where they were going to anybody. As soon as they were out of eyesight, Ryan grabbed Colin's hand and led him to the big oak tree at the bottom of his garden. Taking hold of his shoulders, he slammed Colin against the tree and hungrily kissed him.

"Ry, Ry, we can't......"

"It's my birthday Col, I can do what I like."

Ryan ran his tongue along Colin's top lip, needing entrance. Colin opened his mouth, and their tongues instantly clashed in a fight to show their passion for each other. Ryan stepped closer, needing to be as close as he could to Colin, feeling the bulge in his trousers pressing against his own. Colin began to rub against him, desperately trying to create friction.

"Ryan?"

Pat's voice was like a bucket of cold water dumped over the both of them, and they broke apart. Colin quickly lit up two cigarettes, passing one to Ryan, who took it and stepped out into Pat's view.

"Yeah?"

"We're waiting for you."

"I know, I'm nearly finished."

"We would've been in five minutes." Colin muttered.

Struggling to keep his face neutral, he shouted to Pat that he would be in shortly. She gave a small smile, and walked back inside the house. As soon as he heard the door shut, Ryan stepped back in front of Colin, cupping his face in his hands.

"You and Deb are staying here tonight aren't you?"

"Yeah."

"We'll wait until they go bed. Then we finish this."

"Ry, remember what we promised."

"Col, please. It's my birthday, it's what I really want."

Colin stepped up on tip toe to plant a kiss on the end of Ryan's nose. "Because it's your birthday. But only when the girls have gone to bed and are asleep."

Ryan smiled. "Asleep."

        -----------------------------------------------------

It was four in the morning by the time everybody had left and Pat and Deb has went up to bed. Colin and Ryan stayed, with the excuse of needing time to clean up and catch up without people around. They waited for an hour after the girls had gone to bed, Deb sleeping in the spare room. They tidied most of the bottles and plates away until they couldn't hide it any longer. Ryan walked up behind Colin, spun him around until they were almost nose to nose.

"Smoke?"

"Yeah." Colin breathed.

They quietly sneaked out the house and down to the tree where they had originally begun.

"What do you want?" Colin asked.

"Huh?"

"It's your birthday. What do you want to do?"

"I wanna be inside you."

"Practical."

"Fuck practical Col, I need this."

Ryan captured Colin's mouth, attacking his shirt and trousers with a ferocity Colin had never seen. Colin's nimble fingers worked their way through Ryan shirt buttons, undid the trouser button, and slid his boxers down with his trousers. His dick was already hard, standing to attention, pre cum gathering at the top. Colin knelt down and took him in his mouth.

"Jesus Col, like that."

Colin used as much saliva as he could, knowing that without lube, it was going to be a lot more painful than the last time.

"Col, now."

Colin stood, and felt his trousers being pulled down by an impatient Ryan. Bending slightly, he felt Ryan begin to push into him. He hissed in pain.

"You alright?"

"Not really."

"Hold on."

Ryan knelt down behind Colin, and start lapping with his talented tongue around his entrance, relaxing the muscle there. Colin slowly started feeling his legs turn to jelly.

"I'm ready. Ry, do it now."

Ryan stood back up and began to push back in. The pain was less this time, and was quickly being eclipsed by pleasure. As soon as he was in to the hilt, Ryan hugged Colin from behind and whispered in his ear, "I love you." Before Colin has a chance to answer, Ryan pulled out and back in again.

"Again."

Ryan repeated the action, over and over, harder and faster. Colin could feel his breathing growing heavier, Ryan hitting his prostate with every thrust, giving out a wave of pleasure. Ryan was close, he could feel his orgasm building with no way to stop it. He didn't want it to happen, he wanted this to last. He snaked his hand round Colin's hip to take his dick in a grasp that boarded on painful if Colin had not been immensely aroused by that point. Ryan withdrew one last time, and slammed back in, coming deep within Colin. Feeling Ryan release inside him, Colin gave in to his orgasm, screaming out Ryan's name as he did. Both men stood breathless, making no attempt to move, but instead slumping into the tree.

"I meant what I said, Col. I love you."

"I know Ry. I love you too."

"I don't know long I can go on with this."

"As long as it needs Ry."

Both men composed themselves and slowly walked back to the house, pausing one last time to share a tender kiss.

"Happy birthday."

They both walked upstairs, Colin to the guest bedroom, Ryan to the master bedroom where his woman of eight years lay, facing away from him. He quickly stripped down to his boxers and slid in beside her, hoping that she didn't want to give him an additional birthday present.

"Where did you go?"

Trying to hide his surprise that she was awake, he replied with an emotionless voice. "Me and Col went out for a smoke."

"Right. Can you shut the window, I'm cold."

Ryan got out and padded over to the window. Looking out it, he could see the tree perfectly. So could Pat, his mind thought. Walking back over to the bed, he spotted his packet of cigarettes on Pat's bedside table, and his lighter. The lighter she got him for his last birthday. The lighter he always used.

She knows, he thought as he slipped back into bed. Before his eyes fell shut, he decided that he didn't really care.