Dyatlov Pass [Chapter 11/12]

[x-carnivale-x.livejournal.com]

This chapter is actually, usually, the "favorite" chapter of most of my readers. I hope it will please you all just the same. Very intense chapter, very emotional. Do enjoy. :)

Title: Dyatlov Pass.
Author: x_carnivale_x
Pairing: Chip/Jeff.
Rating: R/NC17 [violence, homosexuality, graphic description of gore]
Summary: The causes of the accident are still unknown. Neither the official inquest, nor attempts by enthusiastic unofficial investigations have solved the mystery.
Author's Notes: This chapter turned out to be a lot longer than I expected it to be. Oh well! I think you'll enjoy the new turn of events. :)
Previous Chapters: Chapter One // Chapter Two // Chapter Three // Chapter Four // Chapter Five // Chapter Six // Chapter Seven // Chapter Eight // Chapter Nine // Chapter Ten //



Chip's hair was steadily beginning to drip with water as he pressed his lips against Jeff's, and his face and scalp were beginning to burn from the heat of the water, but at that moment, he didn't care. Neither of them moved for a moment, but as soon as Chip began to feel Jeff's lips pursing back against his, a loud ring from the living room of the suite interrupted them. Chip snapped his head up away from Jeff, recognizing the ring of his phone, and glancing through the doorway as if it would have helped him to figure out who was calling him. He sighed in defeat when the phone didn't stop ringing, and he stood, and reluctantly left Jeff alone in the stream of water, telling him as he moved that he would be right back. He strode quickly towards his phone, leaving the bathroom door open. The number was unfamiliar, and he plopped down on the couch with the device, and hesitantly he opened it and placed it against his ear, answering with a mumbled hello.

"Hello. Mr. Esten?"

Chip paused.

"Yeah. Who's this?"

"This is Dr. Holsley. From the hospital." Chip realized quickly that this was probably the first time he'd actually heard the doctor's name. But really it didn't matter that much too him.

"Yeah, can I help you?"

"I was calling to check on Jeff. How is he doing?"

For a second, Chip was curious as to how the hospital had his number, but tossed the thought aside and assumed something logical, such as the police or the hospital records of Jeff's emergency contacts.

"Mentally? Uh, well. I think he might be coming through. He's had some night terrors. Really bad ones. But other than that..."

"How about his heart? His asthma? Has it been any worse? Night terrors could be a very large strain."

"No, he seems fine, but then again, I suppose he wouldn't really tell me if he were hurting anyway."

"Would you care about maybe picking up a heart monitor for him? Just something he can clip to his belt to monitor him and make sure that everything is normal? Just... Just in case there are any sorts of palpitations of something like that."

"Yeah, sure. Probably not a bad idea. But you'll have to excuse me for now, I should get back to him."

"Of course, and also, Chip, the police may be coming up or calling in a few days to talk to you both about what happened. I figured I should let you know so it doesn't come as a shock. They just. they're still rather clueless."

"Oh. Thanks. Um. How soon would they be coming?"

"I'm not sure."

"Thanks anyway. I'll either drop by the hospital myself, or better yet see if I can get someone to go there for me, so I dont have to leave Jeff."

"Alright, take care."

The phone clicked and was silent. Chip sat for a moment, beginning to allow his brain to turn in to overdrive, and to naturally, think a bit too much. Would Jeff actually tell him if something were wrong? Jeff was stubborn enough about his health as it were - his asthma, his family's history of heart problems, his low weight - but would it be worse in this reclusive state? Who knew?

Chip quickly shook himself out of the thoughtful trance he'd slipped into and stood to return to Jeff. The first thing he noticed when he got back to the bathroom was that there was no steam, but that fact didn't bother him too much since when he had left, he had left the door open; it was only natural that the steam would have filtered out. Instead he focused on the man still sitting calmly in the tub with the water still pouring over him. He cleared his throat and Jeff's attention turned back to him. Chip walked over to him and knelt down by the tub again. Slowly he leaned forward to kiss Jeff. Jeff waited for him, unmoving, but as Chip's head entered the stream of water, expecting it to burn, he was startled to find it was ice cold. Chip recoiled quickly and even tripped a bit over his kneeling knees, and wound up on his rear staring at Jeff. Chip's brain could only conclude that Jeff must have fondled with the temperature, but one glance at the knobs suggested otherwise. The cold tap wasn't even turned on. The hot was turned full-fledged.

Chip shook his head slightly, allowing a few freezing water droplets to fling from it and onto the floor. He stared at Jeff, and Jeff stared back. The raven slowly tightened the grip his arms had on his knees, pulling his legs closer to his chest, and he allowed his teeth to chatter and to let his breath exhale shakily. Chip saw that he was shaking now, and he saw as Jeff turned his eyes away and intently stared at the wall. Without a second thought, Chip was turning off the tap and reaching for a towel. He wrapped it around Jeff's shoulders quickly and rubbed his arms, still feeling his friend shaking.

"It's okay." He muttered.

But Jeff didn't reply. Not even with the tiniest of twitches. Chip ignored it. He ushered Jeff to stand up, and the younger man complied, but in a manner that suggested that he was merely following orders. He wasn't actually listening to anything Chip was saying. Chip bit his lip and held onto his friend tightly. He held back a shaky breath. Slowly he led Jeff to the bedroom.

When the two were by the bed, Chip turned Jeff to face him, but as he looked at the boy, he could see that his eyes had reverted to a listless grey, rather than a vibrant blue. Chip cursed himself, letting his head hang slightly and closing his eyes. He'd been so close. But he couldn't worry too much for himself, instead, he knew to focus on his friend's needs. He began to rub Jeff's shoulders with the towel again, and attempted to remove the soaking wet clothing, but Jeff didn't let him. The raven shrugged his shoulders and ushered Chip's arms off of him. Chip was taken aback, and as much as he hated to deny it, he was hurt. This was the first time that Jeff had consciously denied Chip's contact or efforts... Chip took a step away from Jeff, and the towel fell and pooled at Jeff's feet. For a few moments, neither of them said anything. Chip waited for a sign, any sign, but Jeff didn't move. The brunette swallowed thickly and looked away.

"Jeff, I..." he paused and licked his lips. "Will you be alright for a couple of minutes? I've, I've got to pick up a heart monitor from the hospital. They uh, they just want to make sure you're doing okay."

Jeff didn't move, but to Chip's surprise, he spoke. But it wasn't what Chip had expected, nor wanted to hear.

"Go."

"I, I can stay if you...." Chip stumbled over his words, but Jeff cut him off.

"Just go."

Chip had never felt so rejected. He would have been lying if he'd said that Jeff's coldness hadn't hurt. It had stung, but he pursed his lips together and nodded firmly.

"Yeah. Just uh. Don't. Don't go anywhere. I'll be back in just a few. Stay here."

And with that, Chip left the suite. As he entered the elevator, he quickly pressed the CLOSE DOOR button, pressing it repeatedly when it didn't close as it promised. But as soon as the doors shut, he clenched his eyes shut and fell back against the wall, allowing his knees to bend and to let his body to form into a wall-sit. Tears seeped past his closed eye lids and he cried out loudly, but only once. And with that, he opened his eyes and stared up at the mirrors on the ceiling, seeing his cheeks turning a reddish tint and his eyes getting puffy. He let out a desperate breath, and coughed, and in an attempt to regain his composure, he sighed and wiped his eyes. The elevator dinged, and he exited before the next patron could even glance at his face.

::

After the ride to and from the hospital, Chip had settled down to a calm state, rather than the desperate and hopeless stance he'd allowed himself to take earlier in the evening. He was thankful that the trip had been short, he knew that leaving Jeff alone for any long period of time, or even just leaving him at all, may be unwise. At this point, Chip knew that alone wasn't what Jeff needed. The things from your nightmares, and often the things from your memories tend to hide around you. In the night. In the dark. In the emptiness of 'alone'.

After another grueling elevator ride, in which the close door buttons never did what they were supposed to do, Chip reached the door to the suite. It was silent behind the door, and although he hadn't expected anything but silence, it still unnerved him. He steadily entered, glancing around the room for some sign of Jeff. He wasn't in the living room, or the front entrance, he wasn't in the bathroom, but as Chip rounded the corner he stood shocked at the sight he saw in the bedroom.

Jeff still hadn't changed clothes. And in fact, his clothes were still dripping wet from the 35 to 40 minutes before. Why he hadn't changed, Chip wasn't sure. Steadily, he placed the newly acquired heart monitor on the night stand. He stood fully and looked at Jeff, who still stood in the middle of the room, shivering and shaking, and pulling into himself as a child would when they felt exposed or cold... or threatened.

Chip started towards him, but Jeff recoiled slightly, and to Chip this was a clear instruction for him to stop. And Chip did stop, on a dime, and for a second he wondered what Jeff might do in the seconds to come. Chip tried to speak.

"Jeff, what ar-"

But Jeff cut him off.

"Do you know what it's like? To k-know you're supposed to be dead?" Jeff whimpered, his voice barely above a whisper, "T-to know you should be out there... with... with your dead friends?"

"Don't say that."

"Oh, shut up!" He yelled and let out a sob. He saw the look of hurt cross Chip's face at the outburst, and while he cared, but he couldn't help himself. "They're dead, Chip. They're fucking dead! And I should be too."

Jeff's head hung down and Chip saw his friend's knees begin to fold as Jeff lowered himself to the floor. Tossing aside the raven's harsh comments, Chip rushed to him and wrapped his arms around him as he slid to the floor. Jeff fell into him completely, pressing his head into Chip's chest as he sobbed loudly in the otherwise silent room. Jeff shook in Chip's arms, and his fingers pressed firmly into Chip's back, as if he were holding onto his last strands of hope.

"I'm f-fucking t-tired, Chip." Jeff sputtered. "M-my chest hurts, my bo-body's tired. I..." He coughed. "I can't d-do this, Ch-Chip."

Chip was crying by now; feeling his shivering, sobbing, aching love in his arms, he felt himself breaking down as Jeff did. Every tiny moment he'd had of beginning to feel his friend return to him had been crushed or stolen in this very instant. Every moment of hope had been lost. And here they were, back to square one. Fear. Anxiety. Dread. And ultimately, loneliness. Loneliness that Chip was beginning to realize might not ever go away. He buried his nose into Jeff's ebony tresses, savoring their silky texture, but breaking at the comforting and familiarity of them. This welcomed feeling he knew was only temporary, because Jeff's beautiful locks were not Jeff himself. And while they resembled the person Chip once knew, the fragile form in his arms did not.

After a few grueling moments of stodgy silence combined with the occasional sobbing choke from Jeff, the trembling man began to calm. And eventually, all Chip could hear was Jeff's desperate voice, now rough from sobbing, mumbling softly and yet monotonously.

"Hail mary.
Full of grace,
The Lord is with thee..."

"Jeff." Chip couldn't think, couldn't begin to think of what to do, or to say. How to fix this. Or if he even could fix it... "Let's get you changed and into bed, okay?" Chip wiped his eyes, but it proved to be useless, because he couldn't help but let a few tears slip as he heard Jeff continuing to pray in that lifeless tone of voice.

"Blessed art thou among women.
Blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus."

Chip didn't say anything. He just helped Jeff to his feet and began to take off Jeff's damp and cold clothes. He figured Jeff might stop him when he reached the boxers, but he didn't. So Chip continued. But like before, he quickly redressed Jeff in a comfortable tshirt and boxers that were too big for him.

"Holy Mary, mother of God.
Pray for us sinners now.
In the hour of our death.
Amen."

Chip still remained silent, but led Jeff to the bed and let him lay down. He complied, sliding into the covers hesitantly. Chip covered him up as Jeff gently rested his head down onto the pillow. He was lying on his side, and his hands, formed in a prayer position, moved to rest under his cheek. Chip found it strange, but did not interject. The brunette moved to the other side and crawled in next to Jeff, but he didn't lie down. Instead he sat up against the headboard, his legs lying straight, but he kept his head turned to watch Jeff, or at least, watch his back, since he was facing the opposite way. Chip sighed quietly, and Jeff continued to whisper into the dark room.

"Holy Mary, mother of God.
Pray for us sinners now,
In the hour of our death..." Jeff paused, and Chip glanced over to him again.

"Amen..."

And then Jeff was silent. And Chip bit his lip gently, perplexed and contemplative. He turned away from Jeff and instead stared straight ahead. He heard the raven's steady breathing and for a moment, he felt reassured, but then that wave of uncertainty passed over him again. Was he losing Jeff? But he couldn't just accept that Jeff was too far gone to be saved. He wasn't crazy. He was scared. But of what? Would Jeff ever tell him? Chip let his canines dig into the flesh of his lip as another tear unwittingly slid down his cheek.

Chip sat like this for hours. And by the time he glanced at the clock, it was 12:11 am, but he still heard Jeff breathing steadily. Chip leant his head back to the headboard of the bed and let out a sigh. But a voice suddenly caught his attention. It was Jeff. Muttering quietly... meekly... almost as if he were nervous to be speaking.

"Chip?"

Chip didn't respond. Something told him not to. Jeff still faced away from Chip, and Chip couldn't see his friend's face, couldn't see his lips moving, and couldn't see the despondent and pale look Jeff's face had developed.

"When we were out there... Something bad was on us... following us. I think I was the only one who noticed for a while. They... it... left signs around our camps. Dead animals. Even carved little figures of people in the trees. All of 'em... X'd out. We ignored it. We traveled past it, away from it. But it kept coming. I think it was herding us. Something attacked us one night, the tents were shaking, there was noise, I can't... I can't really remember. But we ran. And we didn't stop running. At least, not for a while. But one by one they just dropped off... I... I was alone. I yelled and yelled and stumbled around. It was so fucking... dark. I didn't have my inhaler. My chest was hurting, and their had been some bright flashes in the area earlier in the day... I think it was making me sick to my stomach. I ran as far as I could. But I had to stop... I couldn't breathe. Then something grabbed me."

Jeff stopped, went silent with the exception of his shivering breath. Chip bit his lip and stared at Jeff's back. He could see Jeff's body rising and falling with each breath. Chip swallowed the lump in his throat and he steadily scooted closer to Jeff, close enough to where his right hip was pressing against Jeff's back. Jeff inhaled deeply at the touch, and for a moment, Chip debated scooting away, but something told him not to. He stayed still. Suddenly he felt Jeff press back into him. The raven scooted closer to Chip, feeling the comfort of his friend. He spoke steadily again.

"I woke up later inside somewhere. I dont know where I was. Maybe... maybe a house? And I saw them. Chip... Chip, I saw them. Rustem... Georgyi..." Jeff's voice choked as he said the names and Chip's face contorted with concern. But Jeff didn't stop. "There was something there... It killed them. A-and..." Jeff was crying again. "I ran. B-but I should be with them... I-I should be d-dead."

Chip let his tongue slip out to wet his lips, and steadily he leaned over and placed his left hand on Jeff's arm. He felt him shiver under his touch and goosebumps rose on his skin.

"Jeff. Listen to me. You shouldn't be out there. You belong here... safe. With me."

"Chip... It's pulling me back, I know it. I... it's... I belong there."

"No you don't..."

Chip slowly laid back to his back, keeping his hand on Jeff's arm, he shifted to his right side, letting his chest press against Jeff's back. He was surprised to find that Jeff didn't stop him. It wasn't what he'd wanted to hear, but this was the most he'd heard Jeff speak since he'd been back, and Chip was thankful for it. He felt as if he at least somewhat had a piece of Jeff with him. He gently pressed more firmly against Jeff, cradling the boy's frail body against his own. He rested his head over Jeff's, pressing their temples and cheeks together affectionately. Chip heard Jeff begin to gingerly speak.

"Chip..." he breathed.

"Jeff."

"Chippy..." Jeff pressed his head upwards, nuzzling against Chip's cheek. "Chip... I'm scared."

"I know."

"Are you scared?"

Chip chose not to answer. Instead he let his finger tips graze across Jeff's forearm. He could feel the tiny hairs on his friend's arm raising up at the gentle touches. He felt a sudden warmth spread through him at the way Jeff's body reacted to him. He had missed him so much. Why he was suddenly opening up to him, Chip didn't know, and he knew he probably should have questioned it or at least wondered, but it felt so good to have that small part of his best friend returning. It felt so good to feel Jeff in his arms, and to have him react, to feel, to understand, and to respond. A goosebump, a shiver, a nuzzle. It didn't matter. Chip breathed gently into Jeff's ear.

"I'm scared for you." Chip mumbled.

He heard Jeff swallow, but he stayed quiet. The raven shivered slightly and turned over to his back, staring up at Chip; his eyes quivered. Chip stared down at him and searched the questioning orbs, and he felt suddenly warm in the bottom of his stomach as he saw lively and swirling pools of blue in Jeff's irises.

Chip let his eyes slip closed and his hand gently made its way to Jeff's cheek. He leant down towards Jeff and placed his lips tenderly against his. He felt Jeff breath into his mouth. He let his thumb stroke the alabaster flesh beneath his hand, and he felt Jeff's cheek flush at the touch. Chip reluctantly broke away, letting his lips part away from Jeff's with a soft hesitancy. He didn't open his eyes and kept his lips brushing against Jeff's as he spoke.

"Don't leave me here, Jeff."

He felt Jeff let out a soft sob against his mouth, sounding of desperation and need, and Chip kissed him again. He felt Jeff's arms wrapping around his back and he let his own slip under Jeff's small body and cradle him upwards into himself. He let himself mutter against Jeff's lips again.

"Stay with me..."

Jeff said nothing but let his hands slide to Chip's face and he touched Chip's cheeks affectionately, and a hopeful sob eased out of Chip's throat. Jeff, for once in what felt like an eternity, was warm in his arms. And Chip felt almost as if with each movement of their lips, each peck, each tender press, that Jeff's despondency was leaving. Jeff's fingers were pressing against his cheeks, and one began to slide down his neck, and Chip felt his body shiver and press closer to Jeff. Chip let his fingers slip into Jeff's hair, once again feeling their softness as the silken tresses slid around his digits, stimulating every last nerve, and Chip mumbled aloud again.

"Stay with me, Jeff..."

"I'm trying." Jeff breathed back. And the two pressed together again. They shifted slightly so that Chip was fully on top of Jeff, pressing down against him, but doing his best to keep the majority of his weight supported. Jeff was still weak. Chip felt Jeff's hands gliding up and down his back and he felt a tingling sensation as his fingers caught on Chip's grey tshirt and grazed against his skin. Jeff's hand didn't stop, it continued upward towards Chip's neck, dragging the hem of the shirt along with it, until finally it was hiked up at Chip's shoulders and his back was exposed. Slowly Chip sat up off Jeff and pulled his shirt completely off; Jeff kept his hand on Chip's hip and ushered him back down to him.

They kissed again, but only briefly; Chip pulled away and let his head lower to Jeff's neck. He kissed the bruised skin tenderly, letting his lips grapple and graze delicately. He heard Jeff whimper and he took it as a sign of approval. He kissed softly and slowly upwards towards Jeff's ear, allowing his lips to press against the soft, untouched skin behind Jeff's earlobe. Jeff arched slightly and whispered into the dark bedroom.

"You make me feel good..."

Chip kissed again, tonguing it slightly.

"I've missed you so much..." Chip breathed into his ear.

"I want to feel good. Make me feel good."

"I love you..."

"I love you."

Their murmurs were quiet, muttered only to each other, into each others' ears, and over each others' skin. Chip let his hand slip beneath Jeff's shirt and sit gently on his protruding hip bone. Jeff sat up slightly and let Chip remove his shirt. He sat still, almost as if he were exposed, and Chip grazed his hand over Jeff's marred chest. He looked up at Jeff's face and saw that he was biting his lip. Chip pushed him back to the bed slowly and he once again let his lips trail kisses across Jeff's neck; down his shoulder; down his chest. He reached the middle of Jeff's stomach, and he planted a line of feathery kisses over the still healing scar across the flesh. Jeff twitched in response and his hand grabbed Chip's shoulder for comfort. Chip looked up at him, and for once in a long while, he saw a small smile across Jeff's mouth. Chip smiled in return and moved up to Jeff's head to kiss him again. Chip pressed his hips downward into Jeff, causing a suddenly amazing burning feeling through his loins. He wanted closer, wanted more, wanted all of Jeff suddenly, but he wasn't sure how far he could go, how much Jeff could handle.

But to Chip's surprise, it was Jeff who took the initiative. The raven steadily undid the buttons on Chip's jeans and pushed them down simultaneously with his boxers. Chip fluttered in the pit of his stomach and he moved carefully to reciprocate the gesture. Jeff nodded at him slowly, and then they were pressed flush against each other. Chip leant down and kissed Jeff's shoulder again and Jeff moved to roll onto his stomach. Chip slipped his arm underneath Jeff's and held onto Jeff's shoulder gently but firmly.

"I've got you." Chip whispered into his ear. Steadily Jeff lifted his hips up and Chip pulled him closer, pressing slowly into him. Jeff hissed slightly and Chip stopped immediately and kissed Jeff's shoulder blade. He waited. Jeff craned his head back as far as he could to kiss Chip, and Chip bent down to meet him. Chip felt Jeff breathe against his lips, a sigh of reassurance, and amidst the kiss Chip pushed further.

Chip was suddenly burning up, but every part of his body reveled in the heat, reveled in the feeling of Jeff near him, passionate, loving him, and ultimately alive. It was a feeling incomparable to anything he'd ever felt. Their kiss broke as Jeff leant his forehead down to the pillow, letting his nape expose itself and letting the top of his spine jut out. And he sighed contently as Chip's lips connected with the flesh of his nape and as Chip pulled back slowly, only to press back into him again.

Jeff whimpered and supported his body as best he could atop his elbows. Chip's arm was still linked under his and he could feel Chip's fingers softly massaging the muscles of his shoulder and upper arm. Chip thrust gently, allowing his hips to work as slowly as possible, merely easing Jeff and himself into the new and intense sensations. Upon a thrust, Jeff's head tilted upwards again and he let it fall back against Chip's shoulder and he sighed, feeling a wave of consuming fire sweep over him. Chip whispered nothings into his ear, the dulcet tones of his voice comforting the raven, and Jeff felt each thrust burn him fantastically from inside. Chip's reassuring arm, his gentle movements, and the comforting allure of his voice was enough to break Jeff. He hadn't felt so alive, so warm, so comforted, so safe in a long while; and he treasured it. His body arched upwards into Chip with each thrust, and although it was slow and soft, he knew that he and Chip were steadily drawing closer to their peak.

Jeff allowed himself to moan aloud as he felt himself climax, feeling a rush of heat and strength flow through him as Chip came with him; each fingertip, each toe, each cell of their skin coming alive, and feeling that fluttering feeling spread from their stomachs to their limbs, to the pads of their fingers, to their eyes, to their mouths. Soon enough, the two relaxed to the bed, not moving though, Chip still atop of Jeff, breathing heavily and planting soft kisses against Jeff's now sweating temple. Chip held him close, not wanting to let go, to risk ever losing him again. Softly, Jeff mumbled into the room.

"I missed you too..."

[Chapter 11 Cut]


Wooboy! Sorry this chapter took a little while, but hey, it turned out to be pretty long. Only one chapter left! I'm working on it right now, I've got it all planned out. I hoped you enjoyed your tender smut, though!

And aside from the sex, cause I know you did, did you enjoy the chapter?
OH! One more thing I want to know. What do you guys picture as Jeff and Chip's PREVIOUS relationship? As in, what was their status before this incident? I picture it more as an intense friendship that during the course of all this, has evolved into something deeper. But I had a few readers that saw this as something that would come from two people who were already romantically involved. So I was just curious. But to meeee, when I was writing it, I visualized the sex scene as really their first time with each other. Did you guys see that too? Or no? Either way is fine, really, it could go either way, I was just curious.


REVIEW and then comes the CONCLUSION that you've all been waiting for. :)

[Pandora]