CRACK DRABBLES

[xwexwillxrisex.livejournal.com]

I finally decided to join this community seeing as Im on here every day reading different stories, these are drabbles that I created on a drabble machine website you enter different words and it comes up with the most hillarious stories. ENJOY!



A Crazy Day To Rape

Chip stepped quickly out into the loud sunshine, and admired Wayne's eye. "Ah," he sighed, "That's a funny sight."
Wayne climbed off the turkey and walked slowly across the grass to greet his lover. Chip patted Wayne on the penis and then tried to rape him sexily, but without success.
"That's all right," Wayne said. "We can try again later."
"I'm just not horny," Chip. "Not as horny as the time we juggled in a computer."
Wayne nodded heavily. "We were creepy back in those days."
"Our butts were younger, and we had a lot more fun with them," Chip said. "Everything seems firm and sexy when you're young."
"Of course," Wayne said. "But now we're tight, we can still have fun. If we go about it happily."
"Happily?" Chip said . "But how?"
"With this," Wayne said and held out a loopy leaf. "Just take that with some water and in half an hour, you'll be ready to rape."
Chip swallowed the leaf at once and sure enough, in half an hour, they were able to rape happily. They juggled like drew carey on a diet. Three times.
And then the neighbour told them to get off his lawn.

Tight Love

Chip finished packing. Ever since Wayne, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Chip had been loopy.
There was nothing left for him anymore, nothing juggled him, all was funny. So today, Valentine's Day, he was going in a computer to become a sexy turkey.
Just then, there was a loud knock at the door. Chip opened it and stood there heavily for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising his butt.
When Chip came to, Wayne was holding his eye and looking creepy. "My love," Wayne said slowly, "I'm sorry for the crazy shock. I've been shipwrecked on a firm island for the last ten years, living like drew carey on a diet. I was only rescued last week." He paused. "I lost my penis in the wreck. Can you still love me?"
Chip could hardly believe his Wayne had returned. "I will always love you, penis or no penis. Besides, you can cover it up with a leaf."
They embraced happily and vowed to never be parted again.
And all was horny.





A Leaf In Time

On a funny and horny morning, Chip sat in a computer. It was Valentine's Day and he was all alone. His butt ached in sorrow for the secret love that he could never share. How could he expect Wayne to love someone with a creepy penis?
Happily, he began to recite a poem he had composed. "Ah, my love is like a firm crazy turkey, all on a summer's day. I wish my Wayne would rape me, in his own tight way..."
"Do you?" Wayne sat down beside Chip and put his hand on Chip's eye. "I think that could be arranged."
Chip gasped sexily. "But what about my creepy penis?"
"I like it," Wayne said heavily. "I think it's loud."
They came together and their kiss was like drew carey on a diet.
"I love you," Chip said slowly.
"I love you too," Wayne replied and juggled him.
They bought an elephant, moved in together, and lived quickly ever after. 

Greg and Jeff
by William Shakespeare

Enter Greg
Jeff appears above at a window

Greg:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the boy, and Jeff is the giraffe.
Arise, gay giraffe, and lick the horny tooth.
See, how he leans his tounge upon his penis!
O, that I were a glove upon that penis,
That I might touch that tounge!

Jeff:
O Greg, Greg! wherefore art thou Greg?
What's in a name? That which we call a hand
By any other name would smell as salty
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like colin mochrie with hair"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove sexy.

Greg:
Swain, by yonder horny tooth I swear
That tips across drew carey the womanly crack--

Jeff:
O, swear not by the tooth, the hot tooth,
That sexily changes in its firm orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise firm.
Sweet, tight night! A thousand times tight night!
Parting is such young sorrow,
That I shall say tight night till it be morrow.

Exit above

Greg:
Sleep dwell upon thy tounge, peace in thy penis!
Would I were sleep and peace, so disgustingly to rest!
sickly will I to my gay hand's cell,
Its help to lick, and my salty hand to tell.