wl_fanfiction | [Cliche Fic] Long Story, PG-13, The Smallest Thing (Part 2 of 2)

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[Cliche Fic] Long Story, PG-13, The Smallest Thing (Part 2 of 2)

Title: The Smallest Thing (Part 2 of 2)
Author:

simplysly
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: Ry/Col
Summary: Prompt: Pretending to be a couple. Dan has an idea to get more publicity for Whose Line is it Anyway. Ryan and Colin get to be the lucky showhorses.

Part 1

And sometimes, they will be bad, just like in a real relationship.

While the interview had been recorded, and transcribed, it wasn’t until this picture (which apparently was sent to more papers than just the local ones) that the phone calls from their families started. Ryan was hit the hardest.

“No, Mom, I haven’t been doing anything that I have to be ashamed about. Yes, I understand that I shouldn’t try to hide things from you, especially when things get serious in a relationship I’m in. No, Colin and I haven’t been together all the years we’ve known each other. Yes, I’m telling the truth. No, don’t put Dad on…” Ryan sighed. “Hi, Dad. No, I’m not ashamed of you, or of Colin. Yes, I know that you would accept me however I am, and that you would prefer it if I had kids, but there’s always adoption and surrogates. Thanks for the offer, but really, Colin and I are not looking at having kids right now. Yes, I’m sure. Well, I didn’t tell you before because there was nothing to tell.”

Colin handed Ryan a glass of juice. He had been on the phone since seven, trying to convince his family first that there was nothing going on between them, that it was all just a publicity stunt, and when that failed, that he didn’t think so poorly of his family to believe that they might disown him for being gay. It had been amusing for the first hour, but Colin could see that Ryan was getting more and more desperate for someone to believe him. And hoarse, it wasn’t often that he talked for that long.

Ryan took the juice with a small smile of thanks, about all that he could manage at the moment. Colin rubbed his back for encouragement, but had to leave the room to answer his cell phone, which was probably ringing on account of his own parents trying to reach him. Joy. Colin sighed. Hopefully he would have better luck convincing them that it was all a publicity stunt than Ryan was having.

“Hello? Hi, Dad. I didn’t tell you that we were together because we’re not. Yes, I know what the interview said. Yes, I’ve seen the pictures. Can you honestly say that you’ve not seen us do worse on stage over the years? No, Ryan and I haven’t been together all this time. Yes, I’m sure. No, there isn’t anything I want to tell you, except that this was all a publicity stunt to raise ratings for the show. Yes, I’m sure. I promise, if I ever get a boyfriend, I’ll call you right away. No, Dad, not really. I’m not gay. Yes, I’m sure. How else do you want me to answer that? Of course I’m sure I’m not gay.” Colin felt like banging his head against the wall, but decided that it would be a bitch to replaster. His stomach growled, not something that was all together unreasonable, given that it was noon. Still, his dad didn’t seem to be slowing down any. Colin made his way down to the kitchen while keeping up with the conversation.

“What kind of question is that? There’s a huge difference between recognizing that a man is handsome, and being sexually attracted to one. Come on, just because I’m in show business does not make me gay. I’m more than 40 years old, I would think that I would know my own sexual orientation, thank you very much.” By this point, Colin had made it into the kitchen and he began to go through to cupboards, looking for something easy to eat while on the phone. Ah-ha! There, in the back corner, was a jar of olives. It was times like these that he was thankful for his long arms.

“Yes, this is all a publicity stunt, that’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. We have been looking to raise the ratings for Whose Line, and this seemed like a plausible way. Yes, it’s working. The numbers have been better than ever for the latest episodes. Well, there actually hasn’t been much fall out yet, although it is a little odd to be living with someone again.” Stupid jar of olives wouldn’t open. Ok, so maybe it was because he was only really using one hand, but still. Ryan entered the room behind him, carrying his empty glass. He put the glass into the sink, and then took the jar of olives from Colin. He opened it with an easy flick of the wrist, and Colin stuck his tongue out at him, before taking the open jar of olives and popping one into his mouth.

“Ryan and I are getting along fine. Really. There’s no need to come down here. Sure, let me talk to Mom. I love you, too. Bye, Dad.” Colin rolled his eyes at Ryan as his mother started in on the same questions that his Dad had just asked. “Hi, Mom. I didn’t tell you because Ryan and I aren’t together. Yes, I’m sure. Well, I rather think I would know, wouldn’t I? A publicity stunt, yes it’s working. Neither Ryan nor I are gay, Mom. Neither of us is leading the other on.” Ryan’s eyes widened. He mouthed, and used hand gestures to convey his question and Colin nodded in response. Yes, his mother thought that one or the other really was gay and in love with the other.

“I know you watch the show, Mom, what does that have to do with anything? What? No, the stunt didn’t begin until just a few weeks ago. Years?!?! No, Mom, Ryan and I have never… Yes, of course I’m sure! We’re just friends, why is this so hard to believe? Mom, when have you known me to lie to you? Well, besides that time when I was twelve.” Ryan snickered at him, and Colin tossed an olive at him, which Ryan caught in his mouth.

“Yes, I love you, too. And your cookies are always appreciated. All right, I’ll talk to you soon. Bye.” Colin hung up the phone and turned to Ryan. “So, I suppose it was too much to hope for that the pictures hadn’t made it Canada.”

“Apparently. Although, it sounds as if you had better luck convincing them that it’s a publicity stunt than I did with my parents.”

“No, Mom and Dad didn’t believe me, I can tell. They’re just humoring me until I decide to tell them ‘the truth’.” He rolled his eyes as he fished another olive out of the jar. “So, what do you want to do for lunch?”

Ryan seemed to want to continue the conversation, but agreed to drop it anyway. “I was thinking chicken salad, that sound ok to you?”

Colin closed his eyes and let his head fall back as he relaxed for the first time all day. “Yeah, that sounds great.”

Their families didn’t give up, and two weeks later Colin and Ryan had received packages from their respective siblings. Colin’s siblings were boring, but Ryan’s, at least, were interesting. They had sent a box full of lube, flavored condoms, gay porn, and a rainbow flag. Colin and Ryan then had an amusing two hours blowing up the condoms into balloons and then trying to make balloon animals out of them. Their living room was full for nearly two weeks, at the end of which another surprising thing arrived through the mail. Unfortunately, it wasn’t a good surprise.

It was a tiny piece of white paper, barely large enough for the envelope it had arrived it. Colin found it odd that such a small thing could affect Ryan, but then, Ryan’s moods were still able to take him by surprise. Immediately after reading his letter, Ryan had crumbled it into a ball, thrown it on the ground, and went into his office (slamming the door rather loudly, of course). In response to this, Colin had looked up from his own mail, blinked, and then rescued the offending slip of paper from the floor. It took a bit of smoothing to make it legible, but once he had done so, he could fully understand why Ryan was so upset. Quietly, Colin made his way to Ryan’s office, and opened the door.

Ryan had his back towards the door, and his fists clenched at his sides. His entire body was so tense that Colin knew his back would hurt later.

“I vote we crash it.” Ryan turned slightly towards him.

“What?”

“The reunion. Let’s go to it anyway, and really play it up. We can get matching pink tuxedos, it will be fun.” Despite himself, Ryan smiled at the image.

“The pink would clash with my hair.”

“Not if we dye it a matching shade.” Ryan snorted and shook his head.

“You’re hopeless, you know.”

“I know, that’s why you love me.” During their conversation, Ryan’s body had slowly relaxed. He turned completely towards Colin and smiled sadly while running a hand through his hair.

“I didn’t think they would uninvited me. I never officially graduated, but they’ve invited me before, nonetheless. Not, that I’ve ever actually gone, or was planning on going this time.”

“So, what you’re telling me is that your high school is full of a bunch of bigots who were hoping to use you for your fame?” Ryan blinked.

“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you sound so derisive to people you haven’t met.” Colin snorted and held up the slip of paper.

“This is all the meeting I need.” Ryan smiled at him strangely, and Colin felt his stomach tighten in response. It was a real smile, though, so Colin let it slide. After all, there was plenty of time to find out the reason for the smile later.

A month passed, and they did indeed go to Ryan’s reunion. Looking back, Colin’s surprised that it went as quickly as it did. A month of dates and photo ops, a month of playing dress up and keeping up an act for longer than he ever had before. A month of Ryan looking at him with too bright eyes, and hands that lingered for just a little longer than they normally did. Ryan’s reunion was in Seattle, so as soon as taping had ended on Friday evening, they began to drive north. Ryan was driving, mostly because Colin was content to sit and do little for hours at a time. They stopped the first night and were able to get the last room in a hotel, one that came equipped with two beds. They breathed a silent sigh of relief that they wouldn’t have to explain why they wanted two beds, and left early the next morning.

The closer they got to Seattle, the more nervous Ryan was. He was driving with one hand, and the other as tapping out a staccato rhythm on the arm rest between them that matched the one done by his left leg. Colin covered Ryan’s hand with his own, and Ryan relaxed. He squeezed Colin’s hand lightly, and tossed him a quick smile of thanks. Colin smiled back and returned to his book. There were no camera’s, no reporters, no one but them, but unless it was absolutely necessary for Ryan to use both hands, their hands remained joined for the rest of the trip.

Ryan had driven above the speed limit for most of the trip, and even so, they had just barely made it in time. They arrived at the hotel that Colin had called ahead to reserve a room in with barely enough time to change and get to the convention center where the reunion was being held. Of course, as it was them, nothing was that simple.

“What do you mean that the only room you have has one bed in it?” Colin could tell that Ryan was trying (and failing) to be patient with the young man (no more than a boy, really, and Colin tried not to think about what he had been doing at that age) behind the counter. He placed a hand in the small of Ryan’s back, and tried to ignore how right it felt.

“I’m sorry, sirs, but it’s true. We had quite a few check-outs that decided to stay an extra night. We will, of course, not charge you for the difference.” The man-boy did seem honestly regretful, and as they were running out of time, Colin stepped forward before Ryan could let the angry tirade loose.

“That’s fine, we’ll take it.” The man-boy gave him a grateful look which helped combat Ryan’s incredulous stare. “We’re running out of time, Ry. It starts in five minutes.”

The look of understanding on Ryan’s face was gratifying, and they accepted the key cards with no further incidents. The room, when they finally found it those five precious minutes later, was larger than Colin had expected. Of course, it would have to be to fit the king size bed that was sitting in the middle of the room, reminding Colin of what would happen later on that night. He swallowed heavily, and cast his eyes about the rest of the room, taking in the mini-bar (that really wasn’t so mini), large television, and what appeared to be real flowers on the small drop-leaf table in the corner. There was nothing really to keep his gaze from sliding back towards the bed, so he grabbed his bag, and excused himself to the bathroom to change.

When he comes back out, dressed in a tux with a light purple shirt bought especially for this occasion, Ryan is still standing in the front “hallway” where Colin left him. He’s staring at the bed, which Colin admits to himself as being a little frightening, but at least it isn’t the heartshaped monstrosity that he’s heard exists in honeymoon suites. Colin steps in front of him, breaking his gaze.

“Hey.” Waits a second while Ryan blinks and slowly focuses on him. “You had better get ready, we’re all ready late.” Ryan just stands there, looking at him for a long moment. It would be awkward, but Colin has gotten used to people staring at him over the years, and this is Ryan, who, at least, isn’t looking for some fault that Colin doesn’t know how to correct. Finally, he nods tightly and moves into the recently vacated bathroom. As the door closes behind him, Colin sighs and absently rubs a hand over his head. Things were so much easier before this promotion.

They were late enough that the ‘party’ is in full swing when they arrive in their matching tuxedos and purple shirts (have to do something to piss off the people that uninvited Ryan, other than just show up). Unlike the movies, the room didn’t immediately go silent when they entered (tall and close, hands linked to provide no doubt that they were here together), but enough people turned to stare that Colin felt justified. While his first instinct was generally to slouch and blend into the background, this was for Ryan, so he stiffened his back and walked in like he owned the place. He was Colin Mochrie, here with Ryan Stiles, and goddamnit, they were successful people who didn’t need to be at this party. Those closest dropped their eyes and shuffled backwards to give them more room to pass. Colin felt a curl of satisfaction deep in his gut, followed quickly by a wave of nausea. God, what was he thinking to derive pleasure from other’s discomfort. He clenched Ryan’s hand tightly in his own, but made sure to keep his face impassive.

While those closest to them were looking down, there was movement coming from the right that attracted Colin’s attention. It was a man, roughly the same age as Ryan and himself, who did not look happy. Colin caught Ryan’s attention, and then gestured towards the unknown man with the minutest of nods. Ryan’s eyes flickered in the directed Colin had indicated and then he nodded slightly. They kept moving forward, Ryan seemingly with a destination in mind, Colin unobtrusively tracking the man, until he stepped in front of them.

He was short, maybe 5’8”, wearing an ill-fitting suit and too much pomade in his hair. His face was an ugly shade of red as he leaned close to Colin and Ryan to impart his ‘words of wisdom.’

“I thought I told you fags not to come.” Ryan raised an eyebrow.

“I wasn’t aware that you were the dictator of my actions.” The man puffed out his chest in an effort to look more impressive, and Colin had to repress a snort. It was like a kitten trying to prove to a lion that it was tough by puffing out its fur. A quick glance towards Ryan showed that he was also amused. Good. At least Colin was reading the situation right, and whoever this was, he probably wasn’t a real threat.

“I’m in charge of organizing the reunion, and so that means that I do get to say who is invited, and who is not. And you were decidedly not.” Ryan added a smirk to the eyebrow lift.

“You say that as if I should care. Listen, Higgins…”

“It’s Hutchins,” he interrupted.

“Higgins,” Ryan repeated. “I attended this high school, and thus, am allowed to attend the reunion, despite what you may say.” ~~Higgins~~ Hutchins sneered in response, and turned to Colin.

“I always knew that Stiles was queer, but I expected better from you, Mochrie.” Colin looked down on him, eyes cold.

“There is no one that I would rather be with.” And, Colin realized, that was true. There was no one that he would rather be with, at the reunion or back home. ~~Higgins~~ Hutchins seemed to deflate slightly at this, and then even more when some of the other people nearby began to speak up.

“You told them not to come because of their sexual orientation? What the fuck, man. That shit’s illegal, and wrong too.” It was one of the few who hadn’t dropped their eyes when Colin and Ryan had entered, and who even now looked at them with a steady gaze that had been absent, even amongst their friends, since they had announced their ‘relationship’. Colin hadn’t even realized that he had missed it, until it was so freely offered. He gave the man a slight smile and a nod, and received a grin back.

As more people spoke up in agreement with their unknown defender, ~~Higgins~~ Hutchins finally threw his hands up in surrender.

“Fine! They can stay!” He turned to walk away while muttering under his breath about ‘faggoty queers who come in and upset all his careful plans’. As ~~Higgins~~ Hutchins passed what was probably the former quarterback, a punch to the jaw had him knocked down to the floor.

“My brother’s gay, and I don’t appreciate your remarks,” the quarterback said calmly, as if he hadn’t just punched ~~Higgins~~ Hutchins in the face. Colin felt the corners of his mouth twitch, and when Ryan snorted, he couldn’t help but laugh. Colin’s eyes met Ryan’s as they shared their mirth, and Colin felt a smile stretch its way across his face. It felt good to laugh with him again.

After ~~Higgins~~ Hutchins had crawled off to his corner to mope, Ryan and Colin had actually had a good time. They had laughed and talked, and answered questions about what show business was like. Colin had even been pulled aside by some of Ryan’s old girlfriends, who gave him ‘tips’, that Colin was rather considering using as blackmail material. He wasn’t sure why he would need to blackmail Ryan just yet, but was sure he could think of something.

It was late when they finally arrived back at the hotel, still laughing slightly as they opened their door and turned on the light. They continued to talk about the people they had seen (with Ryan throwing in random remembrances from high school) as they went about getting ready for bed. When they finally crawled into bed (each in boxer shorts and a t-shirt), they were exhausted, but happy.

“Night, Col.”

“Night, Ry.” The lamp was turned off, and the settled down facing away from each other. Colin was facing the door (and the clock), but no matter how relaxed he tried to make his mind, he could not fall asleep. When the clock’s mocking red numbers informed him it had been an hour, he finally sighed and rolled over, thinking maybe it was just his position.

Their room was on the top floor of this eight-story hotel, so they hadn’t bothered to close the curtains after they had come in from a smoke on the balcony. It was a nice night, clear for a change, and the moon was at just the right angle to cover the bed, bathing Ryan in silver. Colin’s breath caught as he sat up slightly to get a clearer look. Like this, he could almost believe that Ryan wasn’t real, merely some statue carved out of marble and left lying in Colin’s bed as a thing of beauty. For the first time, Colin allowed himself to admit that he was attracted to Ryan. He swallowed hard; it wasn’t the easiest of realizations.

Colin just sat there, watching Ryan, for an untold amount of time. Eventually, Ryan stirred and rolled over. He opened his eyes slightly, not enough to see more than what was right in front of him.

“Hey.”

“Come ‘ere.” He held open his arms, and after a slight hesitation, Colin moved into them. Ryan nuzzled the top of his head and breathed deeply, as if inhaling Colin’s scent. “’S’nice,” he claimed, before his breaths evened back out into the pattern of sleep. Colin didn’t expect to be able to sleep like this, so close to the man he had only just admitted to being attracted to, but within just a few minutes, he had joined Ryan in slumber.

That had been five months ago, and now as Colin stood with his head resting against a cool pane of glass, watching the rain, he felt arms encircle his waist and smiled. Ryan’s chin met his shoulder, and Colin closed his eyes, enjoying being surrounded by Ryan.

“Hey, come back to bed. It’s late.”

“In a minute,” he answered. “The storm’s almost over.”

Indeed, it was. The rain was slowing, and the wind was taking the clouds away. They stood there, watching as Mother Nature worked her magic. Colin remembered the look on Dan’s face when they had declined his offer of publishing a notice that they had broken up, and how Greg had laughed when they had told him that they were really together (“Man, it’s about fucking time. I thought I was going to have to lock you guys in a closet to get you to come out.”). The last five months hadn’t been the easiest, but he stood by what he had said to Higgins at Ryan’s reunion all those months ago. There was no one he would rather be with.

The clouds moved enough to let the moon shine through, its light catching on the rain drops, turning them to diamonds. Colin turned in Ryan’s embrace.

“Ok, now let’s go to bed.” Ryan kissed him then, and smiled.

“Hey, I was just thinking, isn’t it odd how the smallest of things can change so much?”

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

*arm flail* \o/!!!

LOVELOVELOVELOVELOVELOVE!!

^.^ yay! Sorry, no sex, but lots of fluff. Imma go read angst now, untill I feel normal again.

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I really liked this.............

Re: I really liked this.............

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YAY For NUMBER 1

Re: YAY For NUMBER 1

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